The Journal of Lily Evans
by Mallori Doe
Summary: Harry is going through the boxes int he attic at grimuald place when he finds his mother's journal. When he reads it will he like what he finds out? What is his mother like? What DOES she think about James!Complete!
1. Introduction

**Author's Note**

_Okay, I can never seem to regularly update my pathetic stories but I will update them eventually and if you are getting impatient then review or email me and I'll try my best to update ASAP. Okay I got this idea while daydreaming in geometry so don't be too harsh when you review hint, hint so I'll shut up about now and get on with the intro._

_Oh, by the way. The chapter name is what I am doing instead of a date. Like the first one is "Christmas" since I hate dates so each entry will sorta have a title. Less journal-like but I hate trying to remember dates and junk, so sorry about the long A/N but it is a necessary evil. _

_Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters or places in the wonderful Harry potter series. And you would realize that if you thought about it. I am publishing my work on the Internet for free instead of sending it to a publisher and becoming a very rich_ woman. 

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**Introduction **

It took Harry a while to realize what he was holding. At first it just appeared to be a small, thin, green book, nothing of significance. Hermione, who was beside him had picked it up, gasped and tapped him very hard with her index finger. "Harry look at this! _Look at this!_" she had begun to wave it in his face excitedly.

"I know Hermione it is a book I saw, please we're almost done" he pushed it aside and tried to begin working again.

"No!" she said sounding exasperated, "Actually look at it!" Harry grabbed it slightly annoyed. He say at first exactly what he say before, a dark green leather book. But what caught his eye were silver shining words at the bottom, _"The Journal of Lily Evans" _Harry's eyes widened in awe.

"Is this really the.." he was so shocked he could hardly talk. "My mum's journal I can't.. why.. how.." Harry was almost in tears.

"Yes I do believe it is real, but I don't know why it's here of all places." They were in Grimuald Place cleaning it out after Sirius's death. "Wouldn't it have been in Godric's Hollow?" Hermione had gotten closer to see to book in Harry's hands.

"It doesn't matter, it's just…"

"What?"

"I .. I just can't believe it's my mother's journal I can have access into my mother's _thoughts_." He sighed, "I don't know what I should do with it." He dropped it into his lap and opened it. "I just don't know if I would want to know what I would read. I know that most journals are never meant to be read, I am sure it is the same with this one."

"It is your journal now Harry. It was in Sirius's attic and the will said the house and everything in it was to go to you, and this is in the house so.."

"Hermione." Said Harry, "This is more difficult that legal papers. This is something my mother wrote, thought, felt, I could find things out I never needed to know..," Hermione put her hand up and nodded as a way of saying 'I understand' Harry stood and left the room still thinking.

Harry sat on his bed staring at the journal in his hands a battle going through his head.

'It is your mother's journal, you DO have a right to read it.'

_Oh but it must be personal._

'You never knew your mother it is your first and maybe only chance!'

_Since I never knew her I would not know if she would MIND or not!_

'You might find out be reading it."

I might not too. But I might also learn other things I never wanted to know! I mean I looked at the front she wrote her age and it was when she still hated my father!

'You know she didn't always hate him! You are her son!'

I don't think I should! 

'You need to!'

_Oh! _

'Fine don't read it it's up to you. This fight is stupid. Your arguing with yourself.'

_But it might be my last chance! _

'Then read it!'

_Oh! I, I guess I will. _

'Good!'

_But what if she wouldn't want me to!_

It went on like that for a long time. In circles and circles until Harry wanted to punch the person he was arguing with before he remembered he was fighting himself. Finally when he went to bed he decided reading it wouldn't hurt him, if anything it might even be good. So he slept dreaming about what he would soon discover about the mother he never knew.


	2. Christmas Day

_That was just the intro! Well thank you all who reviewed! _

**Mel: I did, see? Review again please**

**Audreyblaine: Thank you for the review! I think it is a good idea too! I read you first chapter and it is good, I'm going to read more when I get the third chapter done. **

**Kaydotsidot: How in the world do you say your name?I was nervous about how the first "entry" would turn out, I didn't know exactly how she would start it. But I'm sort of satisfied. **

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**Christmas Day**

_At home in my bedroom_

_9:30 a.m._

I just got this journal for a gift and I don't know whom it's from. It came in a silver box with a purple ribbon around it and a note saying, _"To record everything in that pretty little head of yours. Merry Christmas" _At first I ran up and gave my dad a huge hug to thank him, and he denied giving it to me. I knew the handwriting was a boy's; it was in an almost illegible scrawl. So I was confused. I don't know anyone who knows how much I love to write except my family. Well that's enough; I am going to find out somehow.

The rest of my gifts were also really great. Here's a list:

A white sweater from mum

A set of quills from dad

A pair of knobby yellow socks from Petunia

A locket form James (he always insists on sending me gifts to woo me into becoming his girlfriend.)

A book called "Hogwarts, A History" from Kathleen (my best friend)

Chocolate Frogs and sugar quills from my other friend Sandra

A "hair care" kit from my friend Aubrey.

And finally this journal, from an anonymous person.

Today we are going to London to visit my mum's mum. She is in the hospital with a broken hip, on Christmas!

Lily

_At home in the kitchen_

_3:00 p.m._

We went to the hospital and saw my grand mum. She looked miserable. She could hardly move and constantly complained about how bad she hurt. I love my grand mum but I just do not understand why she is so cold with us. She never writes, she doesn't usually accept our calls, and she only gave a washcloth for Christmas. I know it has to do with me being a witch. She's just like Petunia, neither of them approve of a witch in the family!

I am not even accepted by people I used to call friends. My best friend in grade school was Harriet Lipnisky a really nice girl. When I was accepted at Hogwarts she got mad at me for not going to the same school as she was! Then I felt obligated to tell her I was a witch and then she slapped me and ran out. She told everyone and now all the neighborhood kids hate me. The day before I left for Hogwarts the guy I had a crush on threw a rotten apple at me. I was so mad that my magic caused his hair to fall out. Now no one really bugs me, which is good, but they are scared of me.

I wouldn't have such a problem with people being afraid of me if my family would accept me for what I was. Mum and dad are great they are very supportive and most of my extended family is too. But my own sister treats me like vermin. She is very cold and glares when she looks at me. I wonder if she even cares that I have feelings! Well I am going to stop writing for now, still have an essay to write for Herbology.

Lily

_The back porch_

_9:00 p.m._

I am so, so sorry about that last entry, I just got this journal and I am exploding all of my thoughts into this book already. So I will not do that anymore, well not until later. So I will tell you about how the year at Hogwarts is going, prepare for a potter update, mostly.

The term started as usual, I start classes and get loads of homework. It is our fifth year so we have OWLs at the end of the year. So I have been working very hard, especially in Defense Against the Dark Arts, one of my worst classes. Most of the problem is due to us always switching teachers; ever since I started we have never had the same teacher for more than a year. This year our teacher is Professor Robertson. She is a short woman with long graying hair that is always pulled back into a loose bun. She has a very deep voice for a girl, almost harsh.

My best friends, Kathleen, Aubrey, Cassandra (Sandra), and I usually spend our time in the common room, unless we can go on the grounds. We love the grounds; there is so much room and fresh air. Even when it is cold outside, you can go out on the grounds. The day before Winter Break my friends and I had a friendly snowball fight, and then we realized more snowballs were in the air then were being thrown. We soon realized James and his "marauders" were cursing their own pile of snowballs to fling themselves into our fight. I then threw one as hard as I could at James, which hit him very hard on his butt, well then our fight was well out of control. The enchanted snowballs, and the manmade snowballs from both teams put together was enough to make a fight go much farther than it was first intended. The last one thrown hit Professor McGonagall when she came out to tell us off. She laughed at it soon after she finished yelling.

Now, since I am on the topic of James, we need to get things clear. He is a selfish, stupid, brainless git. I am not stupid. I bet he thinks I am! Whenever he is about to go and curse someone he looks over at me and my friends, messes up his hair and throws spells at people, well Snape, but he's still as much as a person as everyone else! James always looks over at me, yeah "I hope Lily's while I jinx someone who isn't prepared, yeah, that'll impress her! Does he really think I am so thick! I know he has a crush on me, everyone does, and he doesn't even hide his efforts. I do not hate this idiot, I just wish he would get a brain, and soon!

Lily

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Thank you all you reviewers! Well Sorry it's not so good, I am going to try to do better on the next "entry"! Review Please! 


	3. Wasting Time

Thank you all my wonderful, wonderful reviews! I love you all, well you know what I mean!

**madsdagirl: Oh no! Don't do that! Well, you won't have to cuz here the next one is. **

**Kaydotsidot: hey that's cool. There are friends of mine who named their cat K.C. to stand for kitty cat. Well let's start a conversation! I am having fun with this story!**

**Audreyblaine: Glad you like it. Now I am not going to tell you what's going to happen, so you need to keep reading! **

**Tee hee: I like the name! Thank you for the review and I am so glad you like it, I don't really think much of my literacy skills. **

**Ravenclaw Gal93: Did you take a quiz and find out which house you might go in? I love those things I am always in Huffelpuff (So I can't spell…) so you like it, cool! **

**TheMonaLisa: Love your name by the way. Wow people like it this is so awesome! Wow that's cool! Ooh original, I was hoping it would be, most romances are SO predictable. I am thinking soon after the relationship starts. **

_Well thank you all again! I love getting reviews it just makes my day! So keep it up, it eggs me on! Read and review! If anyone knows when Lily's b-day is I would love it if you could tell me, I wouldn't want to miss a day like that!_

Wasting Time

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_In my bedroom_

_4:00 p.m._

So now you know some about me but maybe you want to know more about me! I have long red hair (to the bottom of my shoulder blades), which bugs me to death. I hate standing out, but I'll live with what I have. My eyes are shockingly green; you get Christmas colors with my eyes and hair together. I am not very tall, about 5 feet 5 inches tall, all of the boys grew an insane amount over the last summer so they are all taller than me now! I have decent grades (I'm not failing and I probably won't if I do bad on one maybe two assignments) and my favorite class is potions. Potions is great, and it has a really good teacher, Professor Slughorn. Slughorn has made me his "teacher's pet" and a part of his 'slug club'. The slug club is fine, but all of the snobbish people are in it, not James, thank God.

My best friends are great their names are Kathleen, Aubrey and Sandra. Kathleen has been my best friend since we met on the train; she is much shorter than me and has curly blonde hair. She also has blue eyes, which she uses to spot out "specimens", her name for eligible boys. She makes a sport out of boys, I think it is rude to look at boys like that, who will someday be fathers of our friend's children. She has a list hidden under her bed of boys she wants to kiss before she turns 30 or gets married. Right now her specimen is Sirius Black, the best friend of James. (James is next on the List) I try to ignore her ominous flirting; it's impossible to miss. She walks up flips her hair and asks the boys a simple question like, "Do you have an extra quill? Mine just broke." And puts on a flirty frown. Every guy has fallen for it except Sirius. He just says, "No, ask your friend Lily." Some guys are such dolts.

Sandra is just the opposite. She is almost afraid of boys and almost dies when one talks to her. She has long black hair to her hips and it is usually braided into a plait down her back. She has gray eyes and very light skin. Her favorite thing to do is draw, and she is very good at it. Her page of notes for her classes is covered in doodles of some of the most random things. She designs her clothes and sews them for herself; she cannot wait until there is a dance at Hogwarts so she can wear the dress robes she designed.

Last is Aubrey. She is a hair-crazed fanatic, which is why she got me a hair-care kit for me for Christmas. Her hair is cut to her shoulders and has small light brown highlights in it. She is always doing something new with her hair. And she constantly tries to give all of us "hair make-overs" so I promised that on her 16th birthday she could give me a makeover, and that is only a month away on January 21st. She only wears clothes that 'coincide' wither her hair do, and usually she spends at least 20 minutes making it perfect. There are small silver glasses over her dark blue eyes. She does make up to make her look perfect (to coincide wither her hair and clothes) and she usually joins Kathleen on her exploits. (Kathleen gets Sirius, and Aubrey gets James)

Tomorrow I am leaving for Hogwarts and I am so excited! I miss my friends and I need to get back to studying for OWLs. I am not a study freak I just REALLY want to work at the Ministry or become the Hogwarts headmistress! That would be so cool and the first step is to study.

Lily

_In my bed_

_9:00 p.m. _

I am going to leave tomorrow early in the morning so I can meet up with my friends on the train before we leave, my mum wants pictures. I hate pictures, I cannot purposely smile, it is impossible! My Friends all at least look decent in pictures. As long as mum does not want to take too many! She is going to have me develop them so they cam move, she thinks it is so, "nifty" is the word she used. I am used to it, but when I first learned that pictures could move I almost died from shock.

At school I am in a fight with Sandra, she was having a bad day one day and said I was being flippant about that. She threw a wadded drawing at me and stomped up to her bedroom, I was surprised she sent me a gift; she was mad, VERY mad. She screamed at me. Personally, I think she was having feminine problems, which always puts me in a bad mood. But I won't say anything. I am hoping she forgives me before term starts again.

Well I am very tired. So I am going to finish packing and go to bed, and finish the homework they gave us over break, I put that off a little too long. I am going to be so tired tomorrow morning! Ohh! Well I will write tomorrow before I reach King's Cross.

Lily

_In the car, on the way to King's Cross_

_9:30 A.M. _

I didn't get to bed until 10 o'clock last night so this morning I'm about to fall asleep. Maybe I can sleep on the way to Hogwarts. Oh, nevermind, I know I won't. Oh well, tonight I will enjoy my four-poster tonight. Dad is driving very slowly so I am getting impatient. I wonder how long I can last before I get really angry with my dad.

My mum was so excited when I came down the stairs this morning wearing the sweater I got from her. She hugged me and said I look gorgeous; I just don't want to tell her it itches like crazy and I am going to change as soon as I can. It is made of this fabric that is fuzzy on the outside and has some weird fabric on the inside. Well I can see King's Cross now I need to get ready to get out, and be blinded by flash after flash by mum's camera.

Lily

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**Well Sorry if you are disappointed! But please, please review! I live for those things! Until later! **


	4. On the Hogwarts Express

_**Hey everyone! I got more reviews! This is so cool! **_

**Amalthea 727: **It's interesting! Cool. That's a word I use to describe my brother (excuse me I just drank a can of Dr. Pepper.)

**Girlygirlpower: **Frankly, I agree. I was expecting a review worse than yours to show up WAY before now. If I was going for universal popularity I would have wrote a better story.

**Missmoony4: **It rocks? Awesome! 

**PinkPixie37; **yeah, I got into that habit when my teachers made us quit writing words like that on our homework. 

**i-am-invisible: **I love your name it SO rocks! I can't tell you who gave her the diary! That wouldn't do much for the surprise factor! 

**Ravenclaw Gal93: **I am either in Huffelpuff or Gryffindor, but usually Huffelpuff. You like? Ohh! Well Her comes chappie number four! 

**Kaydotsidot: **yes of course I live for reviews! Oh, poor Kaydotsidot! Well I am glad you like the story so far! 

**Audreyblaine: "**Yay" is such a fun word I use it a lot. Well I try to update as often as I can! 

_As always THANK YOU THANKYOU THANK YOU for reviewing!_

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**On the Hogwarts Express**

On the train 

_About 4: 00 p.m._

I survived the pictures! It was most embarrassing when mum had to get a picture of me walking toward the wall between platforms nine and ten. Then after that she had to get a picture of me walking through! It was embarrassing because she was yelling to walk faster then slower while we were still around muggles, everyone was looking. But she was also embarrassing when she was on the train getting pictures of me in my compartment when the train started moving and she was trying to get off the train while it was in motion, yelling for me to help her at eh top of her lungs.

The worse part was when she accidentally whacked Christopher Hopkins on the head with her camera case. Of all the people to hit, mum had to hit the guy I like. The worse part was how the camera case is not a soft cushiony one; it is a large box on a strap. I almost died.

When the train was finally going and mum was safely on the platform I was able to relax. In all the excitement I had forgotten to change out of my sweater. So we were eating the candies we had gotten from the lady pushing the trolley and James walks in (Aubrey just about died from excitement) and sits down next to me opens a box of chocolate frogs and begins to eat it. I slapped him and demanded that he give it back. He put of a puppy-dog face and said "Aww! But Lil!"

I slapped him again and told him he could keep it since it was halfway down his digestive system. He smiled and took another one. I slapped him and informed the idiot that in order to woo me he needed to try harder and be more polite. His face lit up like a jack-o-lantern. He smiled and got on one knee. He offered the box of chocolate frogs and said, "Will you be my girlfriend?"

That was enough to make Kathleen and Sandra die laughing. I gently told him in a loud commanding voice that I would never be his girlfriend. Sadly he stood up and left, but first he turned and told me I looked really pretty in my sweater. It was about then that Aubrey almost died, and when he left she asked if she could have it.

"Sure," I said, "If _he _likes it then I wouldn't want to wear it anyway. Her face lit up and I got my trunk so I could find a better candidate for a shirt. The rest of the trip is pretty uneventful we all filled each other in about how our Christmases went, Sandra and I made up, and we had a long game of exploding snap.

Kathleen and I are going to play a game of wizard chess so I will wrote later, after I see everyone again.

Lily

Still on the Hogwarts express 

_6:30 p.m. _

I am so hungry I am glad a dinner is waiting for us. I lost my game of Wizard Chess. I always loose that game! Of Course Kathleen grew up in a wizard's home with her big brother, Josiah. I feel really bad for Kathleen because her brother got sorted into Slytherin. I would have died if Petunia was a witch and sorted into Slytherin. I at least do not have to worry about that.

I have not figured out who gave me this journal yet! But I have a "suspect". First, Professor Slughorn, he seems to like me. I don't know why though he is the Slytherin house person. I am a muggle born, giving him no reason to like me. He put me in his slug club and he rants about me in potions. I wish he would let me do my potion in peace.

I have another guess, but it is very highly unlikely. Petunia. She would be pulling a trick on me to make me think I have someone who actually cares and then when I talk about it at home she can crush me. It is like her to do that. But I am going to find out soon. I can see the castle! Oh and I haven't changed into my robes! I guess I will write more later if I have time!

Lily

On my four poster 

_9:00 p.m. _

We had a quick dinner, nothing fancy since we only just got back form Christmas. We got back to our beds, (which were very warm and ready for us to curl up in to go to bed, thank the house elves!) and washed up. We stayed up a while afterward talking to the other girls in our dorm room. Toni Knowells, Augusta Ricardo, and Justine Lingstone. We all talked for a while, Toni and Justine slipped down to the kitchens to get us all hot chocolates, and showed off our new things. I showed them everything except this journal. I have put a charm on you so no one can read it except me, it knows my fingerprints, and anyone else will get shocked if the open it.

Augusta was the first to lie down and sleep, which is bad since she snores, I will not be able to sleep tonight! Oh well I will write a little more and ATTEMPT to sleep when I am done. So soon everyone else lay down and now I am the only one up.

I moved down to the common room so I wouldn't keep people up by the light. I love the common room it is so cozy! It has big comfortable chairs, and desks meant for doing homework. The best is the chairs all around the fire they are the best, and the warmest. I usually sit here in a really big chair with soft arms. I have fallen asleep here once.

It is really good to be home, but tomorrow needs to come slowly the professors are going to pack on the homework and I will have no time to write! Well I am going to have to go to bed soon, I can hardly keep my eyes open. Maybe I should go up to bed. The fire is so mesmerizing. I can just stare at it and have no care in the world. Man it is making me even sleepier.

Oh my word! I fell asleep in the common room with my journal WIDE OPEN! Someone could have walked up and read it! The charm only works if the book is CLOSED. Everyone else is up and dressed and I am still in my bed things, this is so embarrassing!

Lily

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Well until later! REVIEW! 


	5. Notes

I was on a roll so I decided to begin the chapter without waiting for reviews. So I will write back to them on the chapter after this!

So you will not get impatient a "Harry update" happen every five chapters so the chapter after this one will be about Harry and his reaction.

Notes In the common Room 

_3:00_

I have very big news but I have to tell a story first. So hang tight! I was in charms and we were reviewing charms that we were having problems with. When we were reviewing the summoning and banishing charms people began sending paper wads across the room, we were supposed to be sending little pillows. Well they were going very fast and more and more was being added I ducked under the table to avoid being pelted by a paper wad. When professor Flitwick managed to get everything under control I came back up.

There were paper wads all over the room, like it had snowed fat ball- shaped snow. It was everywhere! 10 points were taken away from both of the houses and James and Sirius were given detention. We stopped practicing our charms and had to listen to a lecture about how close the OWLs are, how we are becoming adults, and being an example. It was very boring. Finally the bell rang and we were able to escape.

We were in lunch and I was still fuming about idiots like James and Sirius who have no respect for people who care about passing their OWLs. My rant was quickly stopped by Sandra who reminded me about the paper wad I banished as fast as I could at Penelope Washbourne, a Huffelpuff, who had sent one at Christopher. I blushed and while I busied myself digging in my bags I found a paper wad in my bag. Only there was a flap sticking out from the paper ball with my name on it. I opened it and here is what it said.

My Lily Flower- 

_I see you enjoy the gift I gave you at Christmas, you write in it often. I love the way you can write so diligently even in the business before your Ordinary Wizarding Levels tests. I am your secret admirer. I knew you loved writing by watching you. You are a wonderful creature, Lily. I will send you notes, you will never know when to expect one. I will give you clues as to who I am. You will have opportunities to guess in your replies. Leave them behind the one eyed hag every time after I send you a letter. You may guess now. I cannot wait until you know of my identity. _

_Your secret admirer. _

My first clue until I find out who the "secret admirer" is. I am going to start guessing. It cannot be Professor Slughorn, he is old and it would just be GROSS if he were my secret admirer. It cannot be James; it's called a _secret_ admirer, and James does not make his flirting with me secret. Sadly it cannot be Christopher. He had a girlfriend, Leila Jonson. Who can it be? I will start with, that Guy on the Quidditch team oh what's his name? Uh, Klyde or something! I'll ask Kathleen, he's on her list I know for sure.

Kyle Lannabarger. I have no idea why but we have to start somewhere. I need to write my reply! I'll write more later. This is so exciting. My life has become something of a drama!

Lily

_In the common Room (2 weeks later)_

_4:00 p.m. _

I am so sorry I haven't written. I have been very busy, but I had to find time to write more because the secret admirer write back, and we can cross one name off our list. It is not Kyle. Here is what he wrote:

_Dearest lily Flower _(I love that name! I am their dearest lily Flower!)

No I am not the Gryffindor Keeper, but here is my first clue. I will try to make it less obvious; you are so cute when you work hard at something! Well here it is:

"_I seek to find your love, for you to know my name. I am lost in darkness while you are the light. I am cursed by loneliness, when will you save me?" _

_I am sorry it is so stupid sounding, I can't find another way to describe what I am struggling to say. Please write back and guess._

Your secret admirer

I seek to find your love? And for me to know his name? How can I guess if I do not know his name? Lost in darkness, while I am the light. That sounds so sweet, but how does that help me? He is cursed by loneliness. How do I know this is not a weird declaration of love instead of a clue?

I will use the word cursed. Is it Severus Snape? He is very good in Defense against the Dark Arts, what if he was referring to how skilled he is at curses? I have nothing else. My guess is Severus Snape. A wasted guess I am sure.

Lily

_In the Dining Hall (two days Later)_

_8:30 a.m. _

The admirer strikes again! Within a matter of days even! Here's his letter! Thank you it is NOT Severus. I am not going to bother to copy the letter again so I will tape it in with spell-o tape. Here it is.

_My Wonderful Lily Flower _

_Severus Snape? I am insulted! But I forgive you. I can't help it. Your next clue is one word: Scam. Sorry this letter is so short. I have not had enough time as it is. But I will try to write a longer letter. My lily flower, I cannot wait until you are ready to learn about my identity. _

_Your Secret Admirer_

At least it is not Snape, he calls me a mudblood, the lowest term anyone can use to describe someone. Well I will get onto that after we decide whom to guess. Since they are insulted that I picked Snape, then I know it is NOT a Slytherin. I cannot figure out the scam thing though. Well I will pick a random person. Frank Longbottom, a seventh year, I know he is really smart a smart person can figure out how to stump such an intelligent girl like me. Well I will guess that.

Back to the Mudblood subject, it all goes back to Salazar Slytherin. He decided that if you are a muggle you are not worthy to learn magic. Which is absurd. He wanted to be selective about whom to choose to go to Hogwarts. Well he left the school since he got in a row with Gryffindor. Well now all the so-called "pure bloods" are going at all of the muggle borns, who they call mudbloods. It goes even farther though.

I heard there is a maniac running around getting followers. I have only heard this from a couple of Huffelpuffs who heard some Slytherins talking about it. Which is a very reliable source. Well he is going after muggle borns too! So now some people are getting scared that he is going to get them. Which is very ridiculous. I am going to write my reply.

Lily


	6. Harry's Reaction

Well I decided to reply to the **reviews from "On the Hogwarts express"** so here they are!

**The Female Nerd: I knew someone would comment on that but I cannot tell you! But if you keep reading you will find out. **

**Johhnyfann296: if you read this chapter you will find out his reaction. I am going to be writing his reaction after every five chapters. **

**Kaydotsidot: You love it? Yay. Well thanks for not hating it and dropping it like a hot potato. **

_Now for the reviews from **Notes **sorry for the confusion. _

Amalthea727: Well I can't tell you who it is but Harry is coming up! 

**Somewei: yes I think I will. So read this Chapter and find out! How do you say your name?**

**Sexytelguchica: ooh, it really good? Yeah that is a problem I have, I'll work on it thank you for bringing it up! **

**Kaydotsidot: yeah I was on a roll. My best friend would day I'm like butter, I'm on a roll) I love getting reviews and you're the most faithful! Go Kaydotsidot!**

**Love-is-Everything: Wow. I know you're not my Grammar Teacher. Well I am so glad you like it. **

**Sorry if I did not reply to your reviews, but I am way behind and just want this chapter FINISHED. So here's my reply: Thank you for reviewing, I have been so busy lately and I needed a reminder and something to keep me going. Thank you thank you thank you. **

His Reaction 

Harry Could not put down the book. It was just so…enticing. He had never had a chance to know her and he couldn't believe how off he was about her. When he would envision her before he thought of Ginny, with Hermione's personality.

There was a knock at the door. Harry quickly closed the diary and hid it under his pillow and called for them to come in. It was Ron. The tall redhead leaned on the door frame and smiled, "So." He said, "What's she like?"

"Like a regular teenager." Said Harry taking the book back out and set it down in front of him. "It is kind of weird, you know?"

Ron walked up and sat on Harry's bed. "No I don't think I would." He picked up the diary and looked it over. "I never had to discover my mother through her diary. Actually I never want to read her diary if she kept one." Ron smiled and tossed it at Harry. "Actually I never want to read a girl's diary. Girl's are too confusing as it is."

Harry leaned back and looked at Ron. For the first time he wondered what it was like to be Ron. Having parents, siblings, a home where people love you, and last, not being Voldemort's target. Harry began to feel a wave of jealousy for Ron. He was learning now what he knows about his mother from a diary. Harry would never know what it was like to be scolded by his mother, to eat a meal prepared by his mother, he would only know what his mother was as a teenager.

For the most part he had no problems with that. He was getting to know her thoughts. Ron only got to know what his mother let him know. The funniest thing was, many people's lives are not a story. They are not going through trauma's all of the time and needing to solve them. All Harry seemed to have was drama after drama, year after year. He was learning about a regular life. The only Drama for lily is those letters from the "Secret Admirer".

Who _was _that admirer? Harry wanted it to be James, more than anything. Lily seemed to be falling in love with this boy, even if she had never met him. She seemed to be obsessed for a while. She was living for these notes it seemed. Why didn't she ever guess James? She seemed to think that because he gave her that locket at Christmas he was excused from being a candidate for "Secret Admirer".

Another thing that was bothering Harry was: how could he be touching and READING this diary if it shocks the person who touches it? Was the spell defective? Or did she take it off for some reason? He knew that he might find out if he kept reading. He is always afraid that it will shock him eventually.

So many other things were bothering him too. When was she going to hurry up and like his father? She was far from accepting him! Harry Slumped back down on the bed. "So," said Ron awkwardly, "what's she like?"

Harry was surprised at his friend's bluntness, but what did he expect, this was _Ron. _"Oh, I don't know how to describe her." He started, "When I used to think of her I imagined Ginny with Hermione's personality. You know always studying, only cares about her grades, doesn't care much about her appearance, and well you know." He finished lamely.

"And.." said Ron. Leaning against the wall. "What is she really like?"

"She's well, she is like Hermione, but only because the Exams are coming and she wants to pass." Harry stopped and thought. "She is like every other girl. She cares about herself, but not to an obnoxious extent like Lavender and Parvarti." Ron snorted. "What?"

"Nothing, go on."

"Uh, okay." Harry sat back, "Well, she has an odd assortment of friends, that are all different. I don't know how she gets along with them. They are so different. Like you and I for instance, we have a lot in common and we are great friends."

Ron shook his head. "But what about Hermione and I? We are complete opposites and we are also great friends." Said Ron wisely. "Even if we do fight. I am sure she has talked about at least one fight she had with a friend." Ron leaned forward.

Harry nodded. She had talked about one fight. And like Ron and Hermione it was for a stupid reason. Harry nodded and shook his head. Ron was _counseling _him. It was not normal.

"Ronald Weasley!" yelled Mrs. Weasley yelled, "You get down here now!"

"What did you do?" asked Harry raising an eyebrow.

"Oh nothing," Said Ron getting up casually, "maybe I did **something **concerning a certain pair of **twins **and a **little sister** and maybe a couple of **dungbombs **while you were reading." He left the room. That was the Ron Harry knew.

Harry sat back down on his bed and opened the book. It was very difficult to read it. He had no idea it would be so hard on him. The worst part was how she spoke of James and her crush "Christopher Hopkins". Who was that and how DARE he capture Lily's heart. Harry shut the book quickly after seeing the title of her next entry "Christopher". What was so great about this Christopher guy? Was he good looking? Was his personality all right? Why did he attract Lily's attention? Harry opened the book and reluctantly began to read.

Sorry for taking so horribly long! Even for such a short chapter. School is murder. Book reports. Stupid essay tests. I failed it so I have been working my butt off to bring that grade up. Don't worry everyone failed. Seriously no one got above a C. So she gave us bunches of extra credit. Well I am again sorry for the delay in the update. You can write angry reviews if you want, just review anyway.


	7. Christopher

Thank you all you reviewers! I hope this entry will do you justice for having to wait so long for "Harry's Reaction"

_Magequeen: a very ice idea. I guess_

_Love-is-everything: yeah I decided that he has to be smart sometime. But Ron is much more enjoyable the way J.K. Rowling describes him. _

_Sonseray: Oh no don't do it! Here it is I surrender!_

_Kaydotsidot: I was really worried that I couldn't make a chapter out of his feelings, and that I could present them without saying "Harry thought that his mom was.." ya know. _

_The Female Nerd: In chapter 3 he comes up and Lily says Christopher Hopkins is the guy she has a crush on. _

You reviewers make my day! So please keep them coming!

Christopher

_The Dining Hall_

_Noon_

I am so sorry for obsessing over those notes. But I was LIVING for them! So to give you room to breath, (and because my Secret admirer hasn't written lately. How sad.) I will tell you about another happy subject. Christopher Hopkins. He is the best thing this world could ever have! He is tall, unlike me, smart, unlike me, and hansom, obviously unlike me. He has long blonde hair and blue eyes. He is muscular, the Huffelpuff keeper, and sadly, had a steady girlfriend. Loreada Peirce.

Yes Loreada is _nice _she is just, well, Christopher's steady. I wish she wasn't. It is very awkward when she catches me staring in his "general direction". She knows I have a crush on him I am sure. I don't know why he is attracted to her. Actually yes I do. She is a curvy, brunette, Ravenclaw beauty. I'm a regular not so curvy red head. Yes I am a very good self-esteem booster for myself.

Back to Christopher, what I WANT to talk about. I have exactly three classes with him: Defense Against the Dark arts, Herbology, and Care of Magical Creatures. Why can't he be in Potions? I am actually good at potions. No. He has to see me squeal over weird, disgusting, disturbing creatures. Why me? Oh! He is walking by! Got to go. I don't want him to think I am dorkier than I am!

Lily

_The common Room_

_9:00 pm_

I am so sorry for stopping so soon. But I don't know if he thinks it is geeky to be writing in journals. Professor McGonagall gave us partners for our transfiguration assignment, and she paired me with James who was oddly quiet. I mean usually he is asking me on a date or something! It is not like him to be quiet. So we did our work, we were the first to turn our beetles into buttons. So he left the room to go to the Boy's room. While he was gone Kathleen finished her beetle and we talked.

Her partner was Sirius, to her delight. She spent the entire time flirting. I heard one of hers. "I can't do it Sirius. I'm hopeless."

She puts on her flirty frown and looks up at Sirius who is not paying any attention at all and says

"Oh, really?"

She scooted over closer and 'accidentally' nudges him with her hip and says; "Will you help me?" bats her eyelashes and twirls her hair.

He stepped back very far and said, "Er, okay." He proceeded to tell her how to do it. She stared at him and batted her eyelashes vigorously. She looked like something was in her eyes she couldn't get out. "Are you okay?" He asked when he looked at her. "Is there something in your eye?"

He is a dolt. Well James got back and he was still very quiet. When the bell rang he hadn't said a word! Well. Since James and I were the first to finish we didn't have homework tonight. Tomorrow Aubrey is giving me her makeover. So I am going to say good-bye to my hair as it is. She likes dramatic transformations. Well I am going to bed. I haven't had enough sleep. Oh and the admirer strikes again!

_My Lily Flower-_

_I love your eyes, you hair, and your smile. _

_Why do you live in you denial?_

_You know who I am. You know me. You love me_

_This we cannot continue much longer. _

_When I know your are ready. My lily Flower. _

_Your secret admirer._

Oh WHO IS IT?

Lily

_My Four Poster_

_About 6:00 am_

It is not like I have never said this but, what if it is Christopher? He would not be able to say outright that he likes me, Loreada would definitely notice if her boyfriend told another girl he likes her. She is not dumb, Ravenclaws are picked for their intellect, she has brains. That would be a perfect excuse for writing letters. I sound like an idiot. I am re reading what I just wrote. I sound like a lovesick child.

Well today is my dreaded make over. (Kill me if Aubrey reads this). I saw some drawing that Sandra had and she said they are designs for my hair Aubrey asked her to draw for her, and all of them were dramatic makeovers, involving scissors. So I am kissing the hair I (hate) love forever. So I cannot sleep, going to bed early didn't help if I can't get the morning hours in. But I just am so nervous about this whole hair thing. One of the pictures was colored, and the hair color was brown! Oh I hate red hair, but I just wont lose it! I need to lie down and relax.

I couldn't do it. My mind is reeling with horrible images of brown hair and highlights. I have nothing against brown hair, I used to want it so bad that I tried countless times to find a curse to change it. They never went well, bless you Madam Pompfrey. Well it is now almost 7:00 so I am going to get ready for the day, take a shower. And then get an early breakfast. I might write more later if I am up to it.

Lily

Well, there is the next entry. Review all of you. Or I won't update. Ha! Take that!


	8. The MakeOver

_Well I am into the story even more because of what I know is coming! So here is the next chapter! _

**Amalthea727: _I don't know……We shall see. _**

**Bkaym: _I don't know!_ **

**Casinova: _ya think? WOW, the only people who tell me I'm good are my parents. _**

**DannysGirlForever: _I love it when people love my stories. It makes me feel so…accomplished_**

**The Female Nerd: _I can't tell you!_ **

**Somewei: _Thank you for telling me. _**

**Kenny-chan28: Hmmmm, never thought of that. **

**The Make-Over**

_On my four poster _

_3:00 pm_

I am getting ready to say good-bye to my hair as it is now. So I will get ready by telling you how I look now. I am a girl who is regular height, has red hair to her mid back, which is usually brushed and then let do what it wants. It is regular red, orange reddish, with natural orangey highlights. It is straight cut, no layers or angles, or (God forbid) highlights. I have pale skin with some freckles on my nose and my upper cheeks. You get the picture. I am normal. What am I getting in to?

Lily.

_In the girl's dormitory_

_4:00 pm_

She is dying my hair. Well, highlights. But still, oh what color do you dye highlights in red hair? So now I am waiting for Aubrey to decide to wash out the color. She uses muggle dye because it is "more fun". Why worry about fun when my looks are on the line? Well she began by washing my hair and face, (she decided I needed a "facial"), then combed it out and (gulp) cut off the split ends. She took a while separating out my hair for the highlights and took out a, I don't know how to describe it, goop, a yellowish goop. She put this goop on my hair and wrapped foil on it.

She said the scariest thing while putting in the goop. Something you never ever want anyone to say while messing with you hair. She said "oh, oops! That wasn't supposed to happen." I just about died. I wanted to hex her on the spot. While I was pulling out my wand she took out hers and reversed the mistake and said, "How do muggles _survive _without magic?" and continued as if nothing ever happened!

Well So I am dying on my seat so I will talk about something else. The peculiar way James is acting. He hasn't even talked to me in two weeks. I almost miss him, but I could get used to this quiet life style he adapted. The weirdest thing is how he is so quiet around me! I think someone found the mute button. The thing is though, no one but me seems to notice! All Kathryn cares about is Sirius and how clueless he is, Sandra ignores all boys as it is, and Aubrey gave up going after James with this whole makeover thing and only pays attention to me and my scarlet locks.

Sirius is almost hysterical with his ignorance to Kathryn's flirtations. I am surprised that she hasn't just kissed him without permission! Just grabbed him and let the games begin. She now never leaves him alone, she sits by him at meals, in the classrooms, in the common room. One time she followed him to the kitchens to get extra food. He even seems to not notice that she is there! Like he goes blind whenever she is around. Lupin on the other hand always seems annoyed while she's around. Kathryn uses everything as a "flirting tool". For example, once at dinner she was sitting next to Sirius and she just couldn't reach the mashed potatoes. "Sirius, I can't reach the potatoes could you get them for me?" bats her eyelashes and puts on a very sheepish smile.

"Here," said Lupin, handing over the potatoes in an impatient voice, "Save you plaything the trouble."

And another time when she was doing homework, she found a new way to flirt with him without asking for help. "Sirius you look so cute when your thinking." That is what she said. I almost died. Sirius looked up at this girl as if he had never seen anything like her, not in a "she is so beautiful" way but in a 'what is growing on her chin?" sort of way, almost as if she were repulsive.

Oh I have to stop. She is coming back. I can't bear to think about what she is going to do next!

Lily

In the girl's dormitory 

_4:45 pm_

My hair is wet, cut and drying. She is trying to decide how to style it so I took the opportunity to explain what she did to me. She took off the foil and washed out the goop. She put in this weird lotion that was supposed to help the color set in or something like that. One of the scariest moments was when she was doing an unrecognizable spell on my hair. I told her that if I was going to have my hair done I wanted to at least know why she was cursing my head. I was a little more relieved to learn it was a spell she usually uses to keep the color "vibrant" and to keep the roots from growing in.

I was mortified when she began to actually cut the hair. I was scared the most when she cut my hair so that I would have bangs. Yeah, I have bangs. Then she cut the entire thing so it was barely touching my shoulders and said she wasn't done yet! Now my hair is short and layered as far as I can tell. Oh now she is going to style it, with a spell of course. So I am again putting myself at the mercy of her wand. I am so glad she usually does this to herself. I would not let her touch my hair if she didn't have experience. It also helps that she is one of my best friends. Here she comes. She wants to take you away from me diary so I won't be distracted. I need to take off this curse so she won't be shocked. Here it goes!

Lily

MWA HA HA! See now you have to wait to hear how it really looks. And for a heads up the next Entry is called "Good News, Good News Great, Great Joy!" Why is Lily so happy? Review!


	9. Good News!

**Sexyteluguchica: I don't like slash stories. They bug the crap out of me. So that is not why.**

**The Female Nerd: You'll see. **

**Skyhoofhearted: Hmm I wonder who you are. Actually the name I chose is from a different song. But yeah I thought so too. This one is evil too. **

**Kaydotsidot: My friend Ashlynn has red hair and the color of highlights I put in Lily's and she looks great. So you will see.**

**Somewei: Your questions will soon be answered! **

**Sonseray: lol. I like reviews like that. **

**DannysGirlForever: You are very right. **

**Amalthea727: That's what everyone says. I wonder why. Rolls Eyes**

_I love getting reviews. It eggs me on and causes me to want to write and write and write forever. Well, not that long. I cannot update for a while, I have a stupid book report to do._

**Good News! Good News! Great, Great Joy!**

In the Great Hall 

_7:30pm_

My hair is complete. Well it was about two hours ago, but Aubrey decided to showcase my look before I could look at myself or write about it. She told me that I, being myself, would hide in the common room because I am afraid of what people will say. So she wouldn't let me see myself. But I have no worries, Kathryn will let me see in her mirror, I hope. So I can't tell you how I look because I haven't seen myself yet! We are getting ready for a big feast where Dumbledore is going to make an announcement.

But I have huge big wonderful news. Christopher and Loreada are no longer together. So I have hope. Since she broke up with him there is no real rule that he has to wait far a certain amount of time before he gets together with someone. (I hear she has her eyes on a 7th year named Lucas).

Well here comes Kathryn I am going to ask her if I can use her mirror. So I can describe myself.

She didn't bring it. I can't believe it. So I have to wait until after dinner. Christopher has to see me, after something like this, and I couldn't even check to see if I looked okay. Great. Please let me look fine. So far what I see when I hold out my hair, (it is so short I can't see enough of anything) all I see is red hair with high lights, but I can't see what color in this light. What I do know is that it is just touching my shoulders, and the ends are curled out. But I don't know if it looks okay.

Professor Dumbledore is coming up, probably to tell us to start eating. I am going to stop writing.

Lily

_The Great Hall_

_8:45_

I CAN'T BELIEVE IT! There is going to be a ball! A spring ball! A guy ask girl thing, but still! Oh now I am so excited I can't care about my hair! Oh I can't believe this is happening! I can't breath! I can't breath! Oh, well I can. But still! Right after Christopher broke up with Loreada. Oh, I'm having good dreams tonight. I am going to go up to the common room and look at my hair. I know there are mirrors somewhere up there. I am so happy!

_In the Girl's dormitory_

_9:00 pm_

I have just seen my hair. And…I don't know what to say. It's, it's. I can't describe it. It is cut just above my shoulders, and flipped out, a lot. The color is red with light orange highlights, and a little bit of blonde. The layers go up to my chin, (yeah a LOT), and they flip out just as much. It does look pretty good. I just don't know if I can get used to it, or style it. I am going to have to ask Aubrey how to do the spell she did. I am going to go watch Kathleen and Aubrey try to hook dates to the Ball, they're out in the entrance hall. Aubrey thinks the boys in Gryffindor aren't worthy, Kathleen thinks that it will make Sirius jealous and he will kiss her.

So Sorry for my short entry, but who knows? Christopher might be there…

Lily

_In the Common Room_

_9:30_

Christopher wasn't there, but Loreada was and she got a date, Lucas. She looked so smug when she found out she was the first to have a date. Kathleen got a Huffelpuff 5th year named Jonathon Keese. She says that she thinks that he will do, and that he was on her list anyway. Aubrey almost got a guy but he was a Slytherin and when she told him slumped off without saying anything. She is so disappointed. But she is better off without a Slytherin in my opinion.

Well am now in the common room and I have just found a note from my secret admirer. Here it is, I am SO excited.

_My Lily Flower_

_Although you did not guess on my last letter I believe it is time for you to learn my identity. You will get one more letter telling you where to meet me and when. If you are not disappointed, I wish you would dance with me at the ball._

_Your Secret Admirer_

I am going to find out who he is! This day is just too good. Oh! I hope it is Christopher.

Lily

_In the Dormitory_

_7:00 am_

I slept so well. I had dreams of Christopher and I at the dance. I woke up right before we kissed. But I am sure it should have been wonderful. I am floating! It is Sunday so we do not have lessons today and I am going to help Aubrey and Sandra get a date, Sandra is afraid. I saw her designed for her dress. I was impressed, it is long and flowey, it has no sleeves (Will it fall down?) and the bottom is uneven. She says it will be a black dress with silver lining. She thinks she's fat and that it will make her thinner. She is the tiniest little girl on the planet though. But I won't argue. It never helps the situation and I can't afford to have one of my friends mad at me again.

Aubrey got a catalogue filled with dresses that we can pick out the one we like. I am excited. I am going to pick out a dress tomorrow, or let Sandra design me one. Oh! I am so excited! I can't keep writing, I can't just sit, and I need to do something. I hope Sandra and Aubrey are up. I need to learn how to do my hair. I hope my admirer writes!

_In the Entry hall_

_3:00 pm_

Aubrey got herself a date, Sirius. Kathleen just about died. I was about to die laughing when she shot me a huge glare. So Kathleen is trying to make Aubrey promise to either be horrible or talk about how cool she (Kathleen) is. I fell so sorry for Sandra because she just can't get a date. She had tried so hard! I almost want to give her my date when (or if) I get one.

Well I found a note from the Admirer. So I am excited.

_My Lily Flower_

_Meet me tonight during dinner. I will be waiting inside. Tickle the pear and you will know what to do next. I cannot wait for the time you learn of my identity. _

_Your Secret Admirer _

In four hours I will know who my Admirer is! I need to learn how to do my hair. (It is in a hat at the moment). Oh this is so exciting!

Lily


	10. On Top of the World

To my reviewers:

**Alewyn: Thank you for pointing that out, so I will work on that, I have trouble with messing up on that type of thing anyway. **

**Casinova: You find out whom soon!**

**The Female nerd: Oh, would tell you but then the chapter would be spoiled. **

**Jun Tao: Ack! I can't tell you!**

**Sivaroobini Lupin-Black: lol. Yeah, but I needed humor. Funny things just gotta happen. **

**Magequeen: I'm hurrying!**

**Love-is-Everything: That's just fine. I want a laptop! I am forced to write my stories on the family computer. **

**Sonseray: yes! James and Lily Forever! **

**Kaydotsidot: yeah, I am hurrying cuz I couldn't wait for this chapter! But, it may be a while, still don't have my stupid book report done. **

**Amalthea727: No, I do him every five chapters. So you don't need to worry, unless I do that right before my 'Scheduled Harry Updates'.**

**DannysGirlForever: I love to do that! Well, I don't expect this chapter to help much on stopping the excitement. **

**Sexyteluguchica: butt please update? Ha! I like it! Hmm, we shall see, we shall see. **

**Shout2danorth91: I love your screen name. The first part is the name of a very cool song. **

On Top of the World

In the Girl's Dormitory

_5:00 pm_

Okay, I am going to get ready soon. I'm going to make a list of guesses on which my admirer is because I want to see if I am right. So I will begin with Christopher, James, This weird kid named Arnold, who keeps staring at me in potions, and Snape. If it is any of the last three I will want to die, slowly and painfully.

Aubrey, who is an angel of mercy, showed me many ways to do my new hair-do, and my favorite is the way she did it: like it is signifying the new me. I am now the new Lily Evans, and the world better get out of my way. Well, I am not feeling that cocky. Now if it is Christopher, I will need a shrinking potion for my head. I will get as big headed as nothing else before! Professor Dumbledore may have something to do with this. I do not know. I was talking to Sandra, I just told her about my admirer, and she said that if I don't like him she would gladly take him off my hands. I have been getting a bit closer to Sandra lately. She is warming up to the idea of being more social.

Sandra did the most amazing thing. We were doing our homework in the common room, and she walked right up to James and asked him if he wouldn't mind going to the ball.

"Aren't you doing things a bit backwards?" he asked, this made me grin when she seemed to realize what she did. But she recovered from this and put her head up high and looked him in the eye, "Well do you?" she asked.

Now I wanted to take a photograph or something because the look on James' face was hilarious. It screwed up and he tilted his head to the side, "Yeah, maybe. I'll get back to you." He turned, shook his head, and walked off as Sandra came back to the table shaking. Before she began her homework again she whispered, "Did I really do that?"

It was very funny. Well, James has not gotten back to her yet, but he keeps looking at her funny. I bet he'll get back any day now. I can't decide what to wear when I meet my admirer, but I know I want to look stunning. Maybe I'll wear that dress Kathleen outgrew. I am a size smaller than her anyway. I am going to ask. But not right away. I want to tell you the latest about Kathleen's quest for Sirius.

She will not give up. Only now she is going from a new angle, seeing as she has Jonathon to deal with. So instead of endless flirting with Sirius, it is endless kissing in public for her. She will randomly bend down and kiss the life out of poor Jon, but he loves it. Sirius is always busy off in his corner with Aubrey, which is not going well with Kathleen at all.

"It's like she's stealing my boyfriend!" said Kathleen one night while doing homework. "She has no right to steal him like that! He was on my list!" I rolled my eyes and she kept going. "Aubrey is so dead. I am going to get her for this."

"Right," I said, "you do that with Jon around. 'You! Stop corning in on my boyfriend you…'"

"That's enough," interrupted Sandra, knowing what was about to escape my lips. "Seriously Kathleen, she has dibs. He asked her not you. You can't blame it all on her, just the part where she said yes." Sandra smiled and continued doing her homework.

"And kissing him in the corridors! I mean he was on my list!" and it kept going. She was ranting the entire time I was writing an essay about the correct way to turn a mongoose into a candlestick. She annoyed me to no end.

This Ball is a sour/sweet type of thing. Sour meaning the whole "stealing my boyfriend" incident and sweet being my secret admirer finally telling me who he is! Oh my word! What if it is a girl? What if they are one of those girls who like other girls? Oh my word! And what if these letters were meant for another Lily? There is a Lily Moss in third year. What if it is for her and I am disappointed by some weird dorky boy who is thirteen years old, and who was mistakenly flattering me instead of the other "Lily Flower?" Oh no. Oh no, oh no, OH NO! I can't concentrate on anything right now! I am going to get ready. Oh no!

Lily

_In the common room _

_6:00_

I decided that since I am having these worries I am not going all out with my clothes. If it is a disgusting person I won't feel nearly as idiotic, if it is someone completely awesome then I at least look okay. So instead of a pretty dress, I'm wearing a neat skirt and a nice shirt. That is it. So Soon I am going to get dressed and head down to the kitchens. No big. So I am going to tell you about how the rest of the school is.

Well it is no big secret about the huge "curse" on the school so we don't have to cover why Professor Robertson is such a horrible teacher. All new teachers are horrible. Seriously, I would rather have a student come up and teach. James, or even that boy Lupin, could teach this as well as any of our teachers could.

Why is it necessary to learn about this though? More curses to use in the halls against other students? There is this weird Slytherin. I don't remember his name, Uh, Mouthy, no, Mallboy, no, oh! Malfoy! This kid, Malfoy, is always complaining about how useless this class is and how we will never need this stuff in the "real world". Seriously, he complains a lot. Mostly in class, where the teacher can hear him, I almost feel sorry for her…almost.

I think Malfoy and Snape should be friends, but Snape seems to be alone most of the time. Mostly being weird and doing weird things. He is very disgusting. I wonder: does he EVER take a shower? His hair is all greasy and disgusting, why aren't bugs hovering around his head? Gross. I hope that James will throw a curse at him that will take care of that, but no! He decided that turning him upside down and displaying Snape's underwear for everyone to see was better. I doubt anyone ever needed to see those underpants besides Snape. James is so rude.

That is the main reason I will die if James is the admirer. But this all started with the diary, and James got me a locket. Why bother with two gifts? Oh well. It's almost 6: 30. (I write slowly) So I am going to get dressed and meet my admirer. Oh my heart is beating so fast now!

Lily

_In the Girl's Dormitories_

_8:30pm_

I have met him and I will tell you all about it later. I have to break up an argument that seems to have arisen between Kathleen and Aubrey while I was meeting the wonder-man. I heard part of the story so here is what I know. Kathleen whispered something in Jon's ear and walked up to Sirius. Then she kissed him (Sirius) smack dab on the lips. Aubrey jumped up and smacked Kath as hard as she could and you can imagine what they are screaming at each other!

I wish I had worn a million pound evening gown from Paris! Because my admirer was Christopher!

Lily

Da da dum! He he he! So I am leaving you off there. So _review_, please.

Oh, and thank you my new and wonderful beta skyhoofhearted.


	11. Miracles DO Happen

_Sorry for being so mean and leaving that nasty cliffy. _

Alewyn: **I am so glad I surprised you. It is my honor as an Author.**

Love-Is-Everything: **No he wouldn't be cheating on his girlfriend, they broke up, remember? **

Sivaroobini Lupin-Black:** You go right on ahead. I would join you but, I don't really want to. Yes, Kathleen is a bit stupid.**

Bkaym: **I assure you, it was not polyjuice potion. **

Shout2danorth91:** I think I am due for a Harry update anyway.**

Sexyteluguchica: **What?**

Kaydotsidot: **That's what I do too. **

Sonseray: **yeah He was on her list!**

Moonforefairy: **Oh please don't die, then you couldn't review. **

Amalthea727: **I can't tell you! I am due for a Harry update soon. Don't worry. **

DannysGirlForever: **Don't worry about James, he has Sandra. **

Miracles DO Happen

In the common Room

_Midnight_

I must tell you all about tonight. I got dressed into my skirt and went down to the kitchen. I was going very slowly, so I would be late and not seem eager, although I was. When I got to the large painting of the fruit basket it opened without me tickling the pear. So I decided to walk in, maybe they had done a spell so that it would automatically open. I saw Christopher standing by the door. He seemed a bit taken aback by my presence, and soon recovered. House elves escorted me to my seat and put food on the table, turkey, mashed potatoes, cranberries, beans, salads, rolls, and butterbeer to drink, all of my favorites.

Christopher walked up, "Is this for the people who just _happen _to not be going to dinner?" he asked pointedly.

"I guess so," I replied innocently, "This is a LOT of food for one person…" I smiled, "I might need help." He raised his eyebrows and sat down.

"So why aren't you at dinner?" he asked, "Waiting for someone?"

"Yes. Funny you ask. I am waiting for a boy who asked me to be here."

"Do you know who he is?" Christopher smiled and I melted.

"No," I giggled. "Is it you perhaps?"

"Hm, Why do you want to know?" he smiled again, I was enjoying this game.

"Because he was going to ask me to the Ball," I smiled at him naughtily.

"Well, then," he scooted closer, "I guess I'll deliver. Will you please go to the dance with me?"

I jumped and screamed, "YES!" because HE WAS MY ADMIRER! I sat down and told him that I would be delighted to go with him. Christopher smiled and began to dish mountains of food onto his plate. I couldn't eat. It was physically impossible. The boy I like is my admirer. He wrote me romantic love notes! He asked me to the Ball! And now he_ is_ my boyfriend! I Lily Evans am the girlfriend of Christopher Hopkins!

Never in my wildest fantasies did I imagine that he would become my first boyfriend, much less write romantic love letters to me. Oh Miracles definitely happen. This is the best miracle ever!

I filled my plate and _tried _to eat. We talked about many different things school, teachers, friends, the ball, and about ourselves. I never knew that he dyed his hair. Christopher's hair is naturally dark brown. He just dyed it because he heard that girls like blondes; he must have been one girl crazy nine year old.

I told him about James's "secret" crush on me, and how James wouldn't have a chance with me since he is so stupid. Christopher laughed and said the sweetest thing: "He doesn't deserve you anyway. You are too beautiful," I died. I am so sure I died after he said that!

"You are beautiful you know that?" he said once during the meal.

"No," I replied, star-struck.

He smiled and touched my hand, I could feel fireworks in my stomach, "You really are," Christopher Hopkins, my boyfriend, thinks I am beautiful! ANOTHER MIRACLE!

I blushed furiously and leaned forward, "You are really hansom, you know that?" I can't believe I got to say those words to Christopher, my boyfriend.

Christopher Smiled and leaned back, "Oh, I don't know," He said playfully, "You think?"

I leaned back, "I'm not sure either."

"Hey"

"Yeah, I guess you are."

Halfway through the meal the door to the kitchens opened then closed really fast, but I don't know who it was. He left before anyone could see who he was.

After leaving the kitchens, Christopher ended the night with a kiss on my cheek. I wish he would have skipped the cheek and gone on the lips but I will live with what I have. Maybe he is a slow mover.

Christopher is so WONDERFUL! I can't believe I lived without him for almost 16 years. Loreada must really miss him but she is never getting him back.

Lily

_In the Girl's dormitories_

_7:00 am_

I got up early to pamper myself, and now I have extra time. I completely forgot to tell you about Kathleen and Aubrey's "squabble". There was even a fistfight. I am dead serious. They were going at each other like banshees! I asked them each their stories and they follow as:

Kathleen's Version: She was sitting at the table and talking to Jon. She told him about her list and how some boys are so stupid. (She could tell he didn't understand any of it since he just nodded his head and said "Yes. What dolts.") She asked him if he would promise not to be mad, angry or jealous about what she was going to do. He said yes. And Kathleen innocently walked up to Sirius she tapped him on the shoulder and kissed him lightly on the lips. Went sat down and began to make up (out) with Jon.

Aubrey's Version: According to her, Kathleen just randomly got up and French Kissed Sirius, _without_ the girlfriend's permission. She then moved down the rows, kissing all the boys in sight. And then ending with her own boyfriend in a smooch so bad it would have been counted as a crude version of two raccoons fighting over a scrap of trash.

Obviously they are not helping me. I know that Kathleen would not lightly peck Sirius on the lips. She would make it last at least 30 seconds. But I also know that she would never kiss anyone who was not on the list. And half the boys who would be around are not even close to making it on the list. I am going to ask Sandra later. Hopefully Aubrey hasn't brainwashed her too much. Aubrey does that. Changes things, she knows how to use words well.

When we were 13 she once made me think I had a crush on James when she was testing her ability on me. I tried to tackle him and kiss James but he escaped and I was knocked out of it.

I think that the reason he likes me now is because of that unfortunate moment. He tries to use that as an excuse every once and a while, thinking that will force me to become his girlfriend. Not happening.

Now, back to the fight. I went down to the common room after my romantic dinner with Christopher, and Aubrey had just punched Kathleen. Sandra was trying her best to grab Aubrey and pry her away from poor Kathleen. But, Aubrey was having none of it. Since Aubrey's hands were occupied she began to kick Kathleen every chance she could. I ran up to Kathleen, who dodged Aubrey's flailing legs and punched Aubrey as hard as she could in the nose. I am sure I heard a crack. Aubrey broke away from Sandra and began attacking Kathleen again. I got between the two girls and began yelling at random guys to grab the two girls and not let them go until they had cooled down. Sirius ran up and grabbed Aubrey, who instantly relaxed and walked away. Some tall seventh year boy grabbed Kathleen and took her to a chair and sat her down.

I then went up to the girl's dormitory and wrote my entry to you. I heard screaming and shouting, so I knew they were back to more verbal abuse. I hurried and finished my entry and ran back downstairs.

The two teenagers were doing their very best to get away from the boys holding them back. Kathleen was digging her nails into the poor seventh year's forearms and Aubrey was punching Sirius (but not as hard as she did Kathleen) in the stomach. I grabbed Kathleen and when I had a tight enough grip I told the seventh year he could let go. When he did she tried to bolt but I began to pull her up the stairs to the girl's dormitories. I looked back and Aubrey was relaxing in Sirius's arms.

It took 10 minutes to convince Kathleen to calm down and just try to sleep. She was out in no time and I was safe to leave the room. Aubrey had calmed down a considerable amount and was snuggling up to Sirius when I had returned. Oh my, she is so odd sometimes.

Lily

_**Well, I am so glad you all are reading my story, but, please review. Sorry it took me so long to update. **_


	12. I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!

I have decided to reply directly to reviews, so I will not be making a long list of replies. More room to write and I don't have to waste my time on that. So if you expect me to reply, only send signed reviews. Thank you.

**I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!**

The world had been destroyed. He was sure the world was suddenly and tragically destroyed. There was no logical explanation. Christopher Hopkins could not be his mother's admirer. He couldn't be. James married Lily not Christopher. How could she?

Harry was sitting in Ron's room at the Burrow. The Weasley family had decided that they needed to be at home, and they took Harry and Hermione along. Ron was always badgering Harry about what Lily was like and what she was saying. It had gotten to a point where Harry would leave the room if Ron ever entered. He couldn't stand to hear any more 'has she kissed James yet?' or, 'Is she all girly?' or 'is she like Hermione? Is she one of those girls who act a lot like boys?' Harry seriously didn't want tell Ron what his mother was like. How could he? Ron had no idea how hard it was to read this and in the back of your head all you hear reminders that this was not any girl. How can you characterize your MOTHER?

Hermione on the other hand had decided to ignore Harry all together, as if he didn't exist. Harry decided that she wanted to help him by giving him time to let it sink in. But he didn't need time to let it sink in! He needed a girl to explain things he would never understand. Like why girls would obsess over kissing boys on a list. He needed a girl.

Harry shut the Journal and shoved it into his pillowcase. He decided to stop reading for a while. As Harry walked out of the room he punched the wall as hard as he would allow himself to. Pretty boy Christopher COULD NOT _be_ the Secret admirer. That would be wrong, sick and wrong. When He walked in the kitchen Ron began his interrogation. "What's happening? Does she still hate your dad? Is there _another boy_? Am I going to have to steal that diary to get answers?"

Harry sat down at the table, "Ron do me a favor and shut up."

"Seriously Ron," said Hermione, who had just walked in, "You are being so inconsiderate. The last thing Harry needs is an annoying pest who won't give him time to think things through. This is his mother! It's not like he's reading my diary." Hermione conjured herself some tea and sat down. Harry grabbed an apple from the middle of the table and angrily took a large bite. "Oh please Harry, don't choke yourself." Hermione looked at him wryly. "Is there something bothering you?"

Harry sat up straighter in his chair. "Er," he wanted to tell her so bad, but he didn't want to sound stupid. "No, nothing is bothering me." He wanted to kick himself. No there was something wrong! Harry opened him mouth to talk and quickly shut it when Ginny walked in.

Then it hit him. Yes Hermione was his best friend, but best friends only have your best interest in mind, what if she would change things so that it would be easier on him? Ginny sat down and greeted everyone at the table with a nod or a grunt. Harry opened his mouth to ask Ginny if she would talk with him for a moment when Mrs. Weasley walked in.

"Oh dear me," she said, sounding distressed, "I am very sorry dears. You are all sitting around my table looking absolutely starved and I am off having a conversation at the fire with Pearl. I am terribly sorry. Two of you are guests even! I can't believe myself. You must be thinking horrible things about me," she continued to ramble about proper etiquette, family before friends, and what not.

They all knew better than to interrupt her. She was very firm headed and couldn't seem to take things any other way. A trait she had given to her youngest son and only daughter. Harry poked Ginny, who jumped and stared at Harry.

"What was that for?" she whispered.

"Come with me," he motioned for her to follow him, "We need to talk."

"That is no reason to poke me!" she rubbed her arm and followed Harry out of the kitchen. "Now what do you want?"

"I need a favor." Harry looked around, "You know I am reading my mother's diary right?"

"Yes, everyone knows." Harry stared at her quizzically, "It is all Ron seems to talk about."

Harry shook his head. "Whatever. I need your help." Harry paused. Ginny stared at him and motioned for him to continue. "Er, I don't really understand. It is a teenage girl's journal, I just don't understand half the things that are such a huge deal, or why she does the things she does. I need a girl to..." Harry couldn't find a word, or at least one that wouldn't sound rude.

"Translate it for you," finished Ginny. "You don't understand how a girl's mind works. You want someone to clear things up for you. Don't worry, I'll help you." Harry stared at Ginny.

"Er.."

"You are welcome." She turned and walked out of the room.

* * *

There was a knock on the door. Harry jumped. He had just woken up from a nap since he had stayed up so late hearing about the "romantic dinner". He sat up and yawned. "C'mon in"

The door opened and Ginny walked to the bed. "So are you going to help me?" asked Harry, stretching.

"You do know that I can't help you until I have read the diary too." She crossed her arms and sat on the bed. "I wouldn't be able to know the circumstances. Also, I can't explain everything unless she has been a bit detailed in her descriptions." Harry shook his head and grabbed his pillow and handed it to Ginny. "Wha..."

"It's inside the pillowcase," Harry yawned again.

Ginny reached into the pillow and took out the Journal. "Thank You." She threw the pillow at Harry and left him to sleep.

* * *

Ginny shut the Diary. She had read it cover to cover in one night. Why couldn't her life be as dramatic? It was like reading a real book, only this one was seriously true. Ginny couldn't believe what Harry was getting into by reading his mother's diary. Things were happening in Lily's life that, WOW. Ginny put the book down. She suppressed a giggle. Maybe having an exciting life is genetic. Harry could not deny the fact that his life was a little more exciting than a normal persons. Lily's life is not exactly boring either. How could she even get close to describing things accurately with all of those circumstances?

* * *

Harry sat on Ginny's bed. He couldn't believe she had already read the entire book. He had just gotten it two days ago and someone else besides him knows more about his mother than he did. "So what don't you understand?"

"Christopher," grunted Harry, "Why is Christopher so wonderful? What makes him so attractive and HOW COULD SHE DO THIS TO ME?"

Ginny laughed. "You really don't get it do you?"

"What?"

Ginny grabbed Harry and shook him by the shoulders, "She is a teenage girl. She does not have a son, not yet at least. And you know this is just a short term crush."

"HOW DO YOU KNOW?"

"Look in the mirror and you will figure it out," said Ginny as if she were talking to a 3 year old. "It is not as if the first person you date will always be who you will end up marrying and having 20 children with. I have dated a number of boys and I tell you I am not marrying all of them. Who knows? I may not marry any of them! I could marry you for all I know!"

Harry's insides did a weird squirm, _That would be nice _he thought dreamily. "Yeah I guess."

"Another example," Ginny began pacing using her fingers to list the instances, "You and Cho are not getting married and you dated. Hermione and Krum are not going to get married. Ron and Padma are definitely _not _going to have babies together. Michael and I, EW, are never even going to speak to each other again if I have my way." She stopped and faced Harry. 'You see?"

"WHY DID SHE DO THAT TO ME?"

"Oh!" Ginny put a mirror in front of Harry's face and sighted. "Get it?"

"Er," Harry stared at himself. _What is she trying to prove? _Did she expect him to just now suddenly realize that the thing in the mirror really was him? Harry looked at himself some more and it hit him. He had his mother's eyes. He was his mother's and his father's son. It didn't matter about the past, it mattered about now. As long as Christopher was out of the picture by the time his parents exchanged vows. He would be fine. He, Harry, is living proof of Lily's love for James, NOT CHRISTOPHER.

Yeah, I know it is disappointing everyone, but that is the point I want to get across, and that seemed good enough. Until later!


	13. My Dilemma

You are all wonderful for reviewing and being so patient with that last chapter. (I was a bit disappointed with myself for it. Don't know why.) But back to Lily!

My Dilemma _In the Common Room_ _7:00pm_ Sorry I haven't written is so long, I have been very busy. We are getting closer and closer to O.W.L.'s, which means I have to study like crazy, and enjoy time with my newly found BOYFRIEND! Okay, I have been his girlfriend for about two weeks, but it is still new. I can't wait until the ball (in three days!) My hair has grown just long enough for Aubrey to make a decent up-do. 

I only have 1 minor problem! I DON'T HAVE DRESS ROBES! I know what you are thinking journal: _Wouldn't you know that you had no dress robes? _Oh, but I didn't. I don't know how. But I am completely at a loss. There are no "good" dress robes available at Hogsmede (they only have the cheap ones at a second hand shop. I want to look nice, not hopelessly poor.) Sandra can't make a dress on such short notice! She is already stressed way too much, and she can't waste her precious time on me and my problems, but I will tell you more later.

The big deal is the fight with Kathleen and Aubrey. They have not cooled down, actually things have heated up. Aubrey decided to get Kathleen back. She stole "The List" and posted copies of it all over the school along with a description of what the list was. Kathleen got detention for a long time and had to write a long apology essay to every boy on the list, kissed or not kissed (McGonagall orders).

To repay Aubrey for her wonderful favor, (Kathleen was very mad, but that does not justify her action) during the night she came at Aubrey with scissors, it is lucky I woke up. She was going after poor Aubrey's hair. When I asked Kathleen about it later and she said that she wanted to make Aubrey have hair short like a boy's. I slapped her and yelled at her saying that she was insane and now, she's mad at me. Great, the last thing I wanted was for her to come after me with scissors.

But the two girls were required to stay away from each other for the rest of the year. Kathleen was moved to the Huffelpuff house and the password was changed in the Gryffindor tower. Now it is "Alohamora". Which is very predictable, but you never know with the Fat Lady. I can never talk to Kathleen anymore. She is always with her new Friends in Huffelpuff.

But I am fine because I have Christopher. I need to find a solution to my dress robe problem.

Lily

In Potions 

_9:30 am_

Well I think I have solution for my dress robe problem. I am going to get permission to go to Hogsmede and buy a secondhand dress. Then I will let Sandra do alterations. She agreed because she wants me to look good for my admirer. I told her about the entire thing and she thinks it I the sweetest thing in the world.

Do you remember how I had a charm on here that shocks people when they touch you? And how I took it off so that it wouldn't shock Aubrey when she took you away from me so I wouldn't be distracted? Well I haven't put that charm back on yet and I am not sure if I will. Aubrey is always gone with Sirius proving that she is not "a tramp like that horrible other girl" and Kathleen is not even in Gryffindor anymore. Sandra is so sweet she wouldn't even think about peeking. So I think we're safe.

I can't write a lot now because I am in potions and Slughorn is coming around to check all of our potions.

Lily

In the Three Broomsticks 

_7:00 pm_

Professor Slughorn is with me here at Hogsmede to buy my dress. So now he is up talking with Madame Rosmerta getting us some drinks. I bought a dress it is a dark silky purple floor length dress. It is pretty boring but I bought fabric that looks very much like this one and some lace. That's what Sandra asked me to buy. So now I am going to bring this home and let her work her magic.

Oh my goodness, Kathleen makes me so mad! I was eating lunch in the Great Hall after potions and she purposefully rammed her elbow into my head and said "it's the b's best friend!" then walked off. I wouldn't have been so mad if she hadn't called Aubrey a b! (I don't like to call people that so I will not even write it.) So now it is WAR!

I have a Huffelpuff Boyfriend and friends on my side that I have had since I was in 1st year. I am going to get her. No one calls my friends bes! I know that you may think I am stupid but that is the way it is going to be.

Well I think I am going to do something at the Ball. Depending on how much she continues to do this. Right now I am set going to trip her multiple times during the dance. Not a horrible punishment, but it will work for now. She would be horribly embarrassed. I've heard her bragging about her coveted dancing skills to Jon.

I am going to talk about it to Aubrey and Sandra tonight. Aubrey may not agree with me defending her but she has reasons to embarrass her. Slughorn is coming back. I am going to stop. More later if I have time.

Lily

In the Common Room 

_11:00 pm_

I talked to Sandra about it and she seriously didn't understand. She called Kathleen a B and said that now I'd have to embarrass her. So she wasn't exactly supportive. I told Aubrey and she said she only wanted to embarrass Kathleen so that Kathleen will fall on her face after in front of all of her boys on the list.

But I am writing to say that I can't write for a while because O.W.L.'s are coming and I need to study. I may give a brief explanation of the Ball but I probably will not write until my O.W.L.'s are finished. I am afraid of failing and not getting a job when I am out of school.

Lily.

_**And Like Lily I will not write much more because I have exams and I want to do well and get into a good College. So you will have a bit of time without me writing, but you will get a wonderful description of the ball, (That is the next Entry!) **_


	14. The Spring Ball

_**Oh my word! Over 100 reviews! I can't believe it! Squeals You are all wonderful and please keep it up! Squeals even louder **_

_Warning: This chapter is un-beta-ed. So please excuse all my mistakes. Thank you. So please review. Please. _

**The Spring Ball**

In the Common Room 

_Midnight_

I am exhausted so I will tell you about before the ball before I get on a long entry about the Ball itself.

I brought the dress to Sandra and she worked a miracle. I tried it on and it was like I was wearing purple silky sack. This was a big miracle she worked. I couldn't believe that she did it. I couldn't believe it.

The dress was cut up to my knees and she added some of the fabric from the bottom on to the top to make it extra flowey. Then she cut the long sleeves off. Actually there are no sleeves on the top that are made of silk. Her biggest job was sewing on lace sleeves. Around the bust she put on some extra fabric to show off my curves. (It was still an elaborate sack until she did that.) So then it looked pretty much like a cocktail dress. She had a big surprise for me when she magidked on some of her pearl beads to the lining of the bottom and around to neckline. Then she found a pair of ivory shoes for me to wear. (To match the pearls) I know that it is hard to form a mental picture but it is so pretty. I would draw a picture but that would just scare you.

My hair was not put into an up-do like Aubrey promised but it was so much better. She pulled half of it up and tied it with a ribbon. She curled the ends with a weird trick she had found in a magic book. She would wrap my hair around her wand and said an incantation. They turned out to be beautiful loose ringlets. The rest was curled in the same way. The coolest part was that she used a spell and put in some small purplish highlights (they wash out in one shower) and glitter. I know purple color in red hair does not sound at all attractive but they are very small strips that are almost not noticeable unless you are within conversation distance. It looks fine.

Now I will describe Aubrey's outfit. She is wearing a very red floor-length gown. It is sleeveless so she wore a sash around her arms. Her hair is all down and curled. It is very pretty because she put in a red flower. Her hair has no added color but it does have enough sparkled and hairspray to be a hazard to the atmosphere. (The flower is fake if you are wondering why it would not have died)

Sandra has the best dress I am sure. She has a black dress that is not even to her knees. The entire thing is lacy and tight. Most of the dress is lace on a solid fabric except the arms. The arms is just lace. She wore fishnet tights and silver shoes. I know that silver shoes do not sound good but it does because she has silver lining around the collar and the edges at the bottom. Before I saw it in full on her I thought she would look like a scary rebellious teenager, you know, the ones that wear all black and stuff? She just looked really fancy. Her hair was put up into an up-do. She put a silver cord around her head like a simple silver crown. I thought she looked beautiful. Her face was all glittery and she wore bright red lipstick, (I really stuck out) which was surprisingly not too colorful.

Christopher wore regular black dress robes with dark purple silk lining. (Sandra took him aside and told him that we had to match) He gave me a rose when we met in the Entry Hall.

Kathleen deserves a nice critiquing. She wore a bubblegum pink dress that was too tight on her. (And so was her bra, Which the tight dress enhanced) her shoes were white and her hair was let down and you could tell she was attempting to have it curl g4racefull at her shoulders. Instead it was a bit frizzy at the bottom. Jonathan didn't seem to care though (the great thing about some guys. You could be wearing the dirtiest blouse and not matching shirt and they might not even care, that's how Christopher is.)

Well I am exhausted. So be prepared for a wonderful description tomorrow morning. I don't have school to stop me then because it is a Sunday.

Lily

In the Library 

_10:00 pm_

Everything was a mess in the common room. All the couples met again for another kissing session. Christopher told me that we would talk tonight because he wanted to spend time with the guys. I have no problem with that, we both had friends before we had each other, I don't want his relationship with them to suffer.

Now, for the Ball.

I will begin when we were first done getting ready. We (Aubrey, Sandra, and I) decided to walk down the stairs to the common room together although we all didn't have dates in Gryffindor. We walked down and the first to be ushered off by her date was Aubrey. Sirius is not so much a lady's man. He walked up and did a light punch on the shoulder and said "'Sup?"

Aubrey grimaced and punched him the same way, "Not much." He laughed and walked away.

"Coming or not?" he said when he turned around.

Aubrey was repulsed and growled as she walked away. "This will never do." She said under her breath.

When James came to Sandra, she said, "Please say you have better manners than Sirius." before he could do anything.

"Er, I have better manners than Sirius?" he offered her his elbow and Sandra breathed a sigh of relief before taking it.

I walked out to the Entry Hall alone. There were a lot of different house couples meeting out there. I walked down the marble steps and looked over the crowd trying to find Christopher. I was at the bottom before I saw him. He was walking toward me with a cute smile on his face.

He bent down to kiss my hand and then offered me a flower. I was blown away by how much of a Gentleman he was. He walked me to the Great Hall, directing me by his elbow. I first saw Kathleen there. She flashed a sour smile at me as she and Jonathan walked by. The smile seemed to say, "Look what _I _have compare to _you_." I had to say that Jonathan did look rather nice. His hair waved just right and he had a dashing smile. But Seriously, he was NOTHING compared to Christopher.

The Great Hall looked very different. The bewitched ceiling was beautiful. The walls were decorated with a dark blue material that sparkled a different many different colors. Instead of the long house tables there was round tables all around the perimeter of the room. The table clothes were either silver of gold. There were candles floating above them, and they were not just there being still, they were slowly moving around. In the middle the floor was slightly more elevated then the rest for the head boys and girls and their dates to dance. The different levels of the floor were different colors. The highest level where the teachers and head boys and girls would dance was shimmery, velvety purple. The next level for the prefects and their dates was emerald velvet green. And the level where everyone would dance was black.

Christopher and I sat at a table with Sandra, James, Sirius, Aubrey, Lionel (Christopher's Best friend), and Harriett (His date). There were little black menus with gold letter at each place. Dumbledore showed everyone how to use them. You would day what you wanted to your plate and it would appear on it.

I ordered grilled chicken and Christopher ordered a steak. Harriett began to throw a fit because there were no vegetarian dishes on the menu. Lionel tried to comfort her, telling her that the poor cow would understand her situation and he wouldn't mind. This obviously did nothing and she stood up and began yelling at him about how the cow would not understand because he is dead. He was killed for horrible people like Him who didn't understand that that cow was living. With eyes and a nose. It would walk, breath, and it would say things too, even if it were not in a human language. This cow obviously had a mother, how else would it have been born? And if people did not understand that then they should be killed and fed to pigs. She stomped off leaving a very embarrassed Lionel.

As soon as the first teacher was finished the dancing began. Dumbledore had gotten a new band called "The Weird Sisters" who played many different songs for us to dance to. Christopher and I danced until we thought our feet would fall off. It was so much fun.

Well I hope you did not forget diary that I was going to prank Kathleen and I did. I had finished dancing and I was off getting some punch to drink. Kathleen was up there too. I poured myself some water and turned. I accidentally ran into her, all of my water spilled all over me while her grape juice covered her used-to-be hot pink front. I grabbed a cloth and began to wipe her off saying "I am so sorry!" and "Clumsy me!"

She just pushed me away and began screaming hysterically "You did that on purpose! I cannot believe you did that! You are such a horrible B----!" She continued.

I again moved forward giving her many clothes saying "Oh, dear! You can wipe your self off with that! I hope the stain comes out!" She would have none of it and began to stomp out of the great hall. For some reason, the carpet was not laid completely straight, or maybe it was charmed to fold up at that moment, but the poor girl tripped and fell face-flat onto the floor. Poor thing. She ran out of the room screaming curses at whomever she would see, but she wasn't exactly thinking so most of then were "abracadabra!" or something. Jonathan just stood there dumbfounded.

Then it was Aubrey's turn. You see, She could not stand Sirius for another minute. So she told him to leave her alone and go act like a dork for someone else. She walked up to Jonathan and said, "I am sorry your date abandoned you. I guess she doesn't care." He looked at her and sat down. Aubrey then proceeded to "comfort" him.

I know that seems very mean. But for heavens sake! She needed to learn what not to call us, and how not to treat men! I hope she will get over herself.

Well I am going to go study for OWLs. I may not write for a while, OWLs are in only 2 months!

Lily

_**Please Review! And have a **_

_**Merry Christmas and a happy New year! **_


	15. OWLs

**_Sorry for taking so long to update. I was very busy, But HAPPY NEW YEAR! _**

**_review. _**

**OWLs**

_In the Common Room_

_7:00 am_

I have not written in 2 months, and OWLs are tomorrow. I am so stressed. I have already gone to Madame Pompfrey twice because I got a fever and basically went insane from studying. I told Christopher that I was not going to be able to see him for a month, and he was so sad, it was so sweet. So we kissed forever at the end of our dinner. (He loves to take me on special dinners in the kitchens) I hate having OWLs, but I have finally decided what I want to be. I want to be a healer.

I know it may take a while to go through schooling after school but I want to help people in need. Also my mother wanted me to be a doctor ever since I was little, she would be very happy. Professor McGonagall said that I have a very good chance at getting into the right NEWT classes. That was a great confidence boost I need no distractions.

Well since I have gone insane twice during class Professor Slughorn told me to take a break, he is a very good teacher so I decided to take his advice. So I decided to update the story of my life. Ooh, that sounded so mature. (And if not, I don't care, 3 seconds happiness was worth it)

Do you want to hear about Kathleen? Well if not then skip this part. After the Ball she stayed in the Huffelpuff dorm for about a week. Her friends put it "picking up the shattered pieces of what she used to call her life" I think they were being dramatic. Just maybe. When she came out I thought she would be intent on revenge, but she left us well enough alone. Jonathan broke up with her right after the ball. I actually felt bad for her. But I soon got over it. She came up to me once during dinner and pretended to apologize. She was like "I am sorry for how I acted. We used to be best friends Lil, what happened? I deserved everything you did to me at the Ball. So will you accept this cheesecake as a stab at a new friendship?"

Me, being the naive girl I am, believed her. She gave the cheesecake all right. She also gave it to my hair and my shirt, and my face. Oh. I did not feel sorry for her anymore. I poured my pumpkin juice over her head and said "Oh yeah, Friends Forever." And walked away with a big smile. She screamed many flowery words at me. I really did not care. I didn't care when I got two weeks detention. I was actually satisfied.

Well, Aubrey was so mad a Sirius for being unromantic at the ball and broke up with him saying that Kathleen wasted her time trying to get him to kiss her. Sirius didn't seem to care it probably just bounced around in that airhead of his and flew right out. Sandra broke up with James but they had a blast at the ball. She said they broke up because it was not much of a date. It was more like two friends hanging out at the ball.

Well I have said enough, I probably won't write more until after OWLs, I am getting stressed again, great.

Lily

On the Grounds 

_3:00 pm_

Well, my Transfiguration OWL is finished. One test is done with. I can't write much because I have one more test (Charms) and I need to do last minute studying. Tomorrow I have the Practical tests for those. Hopefully that will go well. It was really easy. We had to transfigure a plate into a mushroom. I did it on the first try.

A Girl in Slytherin, Gretchen, couldn't do it and broke down in tears. Professor Slughorn looked so disappointed. I thought that Severus Snape was going to beat her up when I saw his face when he found out. He is a disgusting boy. Usually I could care less about James cursing him. But I had to be born a good person and so deep down I actually care. Great. He is a very dedicated Slytherin. It is very annoying normally.

Well I am going to study. If I fail Charms then I might not be able to become a healer, which would completely destroy me. So I have to go, I will write more later.

Lily

In the Girl's Dormitories 

_9:00 pm_

Well I have finished all of my exams. I am sorry I didn't write. I am so annoyed with James. He started hexing Snape out of nowhere, and when I tried to stop him Snape called me a mudblood! I pretended I didn't care, but seriously, I was trying to help him and he just insults me! I asked James why he was even bothering to curse Snape, and he said, "Well, it's more the fact that he exists if you know what I mean…" if I was angry before now I was furious! He is so pathetic!

People even started laughing at James, like he was funny or something! Then he said he would stop if I would go out with him. Yeah, like I was going to fall for that one, he must think I am really thick. Snape got his wand and then threw a curse at James, which made a slash across his face I didn't feel the least bit sorry for him. He deserved it. Then the slimeball flipped Snape upside down. It was very disgusting. You could see his underpants. I will not go into description of those underpants. (That would be unnecessary)

I told them to let him down, they did, but he landed in a crumpled heap. Then they lifted him up again. Again when I told then to quit they dropped him on the ground. He threatened to hex me, but I knew he wouldn't. That is when Snape called me a mudblood. I told him that I wouldn't bother anymore and that he needs to wash his underpants.

James tried to make him apologize. I would not accept a forced apology. I told him that he is as bad as Snape is, even if he didn't call me a mudblood. I told him many things. I told him he was not cool for messing up his hair, it did not make him look cooler or look like he just came off his bloody broom after catching the bloody snitch. He was not impressing showing off his snitch, which he stole, that is not attractive. He is not cool or more powerful for hexing people who slightly bug him just because he can. He has a big head, way too big to get on his bloody broomstick, much less get off the ground. Nothing can lift that weight. I ran off, I was probably going to kill him, but I had to get away before I could sink to his level. And he just started up again.

Yes James, that is exactly how you woo a girl into going out with you. You are SO smart.

Lily


	16. making Peace

**Making Peace**

_On the Hogwarts Express_

_Noon_

All right, I haven't written in a while, I have been mad at James still, and he continues to flirt. Has he forgotten that I have a boyfriend? Ugh! He makes me so mad. How could Sandra stand him for that night at the ball, and still be friends with him?

That is not the point of this entry though. Christopher tells me about how Kathleen is doing, (we were friends ever since 1st year), usually how she announces me secrets to the entire house. One secret is how I am still afraid of the dark and I have to sleep with my blankie so I can sleep. So now I am the laughing stock of the school. She also talked about how I had a crush on one of our former Defense against the Dark Arts teachers, Professor Knoworth, (he did have a very nice smile, and his hair had a certain something to it.) Now people shove pictures of him in my face and stuff telling me I should kiss it or something. For heaven's Sake I was eleven.

Well Christopher told me about how she was taken by Professor Sprout to Professor Dumbledore. No one knew why but all of her belongings were taken from the 5th year girl's dormitories. So everyone who actually cared was confused. During Dinner that night she walked up to Sandra, Aubrey, and I. We (me and Sandra) had to hold Aubrey back. She was about to lunge out to attack her. "You are acting like a toddler," I whispered in her ear, "_grow up!" _She made a face at me and stared at Kathleen coolly.

Kathleen nervously swayed from one foot to the other, and then she looked at us in the eye. Aubrey didn't seem to care where she looked and angrily said, "Would you get a move on? I have a life to live!"

"Well," said Kathleen who had suddenly found courage, "since I don't want to waste your precious time. Professor Dumbledore says that I am moving back into our dorm…"

"_Our _dorm?" said Aubrey glaring at Kathleen like a maniac, "You seemed happy to move out in the first place! It has not been your dorm since you moved out and brainwashed all of our Huffelpuff friends!"

"Brainwashed, did I?" Kathleen stepped forward and continued glaring at Aubrey. "They were in fact in agreement with me when I moved in! If you think I am making that up then how could I get you to understand?"

"Explain why you are so "Holy" and I am the problem here."

Kathleen sighed and walked around the table and sat across from Aubrey, beside me, where she used to always sit. "I never said I was right! I feel bad about doing that to undeserving men, even if some of them are not so manly, namely Sirius. I heard about your catastrophic date, my condolences. Anyway, I would have cared less if you went to the Dance with someone on "The List" but you had to go with my specimen. The one I wanted to Dance with. I had been trying to hook him for months! My best friend, who even went with me on some of my ventures, betrayed me. Then when I decided to make things better, make it so I would be able to bear to see you lip locking him, you attack. Me. I know I should have told you. I know I should have prepared you. I know that part of it is my fault. I just got angry when you began insulting and attacking me. I was hurt and retaliated. I should not hove tried to cut your hair, I should not hove done half the things you did and regret calling you the names, and things I did.

"I hope you were open to what I just said." Tears were spilling down her face. I was touched, well sort of. I looked at Aubrey and she was inspecting her nails. I wanted to smack her upside the head. I looked back at Kathleen who was talking again. "Even if you don't forgive me, can't we just put aside our differences? If not I can transfer to Durmstrang, or Beuxbatons." (sp?)

Then Sandra jumped, "Transfer?" she knocked over a glass of pumpkin juice and she basically shouted across the room. So now everyone was staring at them and there was a large orange stain down my front. "Y.. you can't transfer! You can no…why…how…huh…I don't under…oh…"

"Hang on." Said Kathleen loudly. "Sit." She pointed to the chair. Sandra sat and stared at the table. "Professor Dumbledore talked to me and he said that tonight I am moving back to our dorm, as I said before. We need to settle our differences because if we don't all four of us will be expelled."

"Why all of us?" asked Aubrey who was staring at her empty plate, "Those two did nothing."

Kathleen glared at me. "Uh," I started, "Well I was behind the, _happening _at the ball." Aubrey looked up at stared at me quizzically for a couple seconds before it dawned on her."

"Oh."

"No!" Sandra was bawling, "I can't b..be ex..e..expelled! It's" she suddenly regained her composure, "UNJUST. I DID NOTHING. I WAS NOT PART OF THE PRANK. I WAS NOT PART OF YOUR FIGHT AND I AM NOT GOING TO BE PUNISHED!" Everyone in the great hall was staring at her by now. "I am going to sit down now." she whispered.

"You knew about it though, and you did nothing." Explained Kathleen, "You just let it happen." The rest of the time was spent complaining about how unjust it was. Aubrey just said nothing and glared at Kathleen. 'great' I though 'were are so close to being expelled and she still holds her petty grudge.'

Oh, Christopher wants me to play exploding snap with him. I need to prove that women are not inferior to men. Or just beat him.

Lily

_In my Room (At home!)_

_9:00pm_

I beat Christopher if you wanted to know. It wasn't even hard. Oh well, I am going to continue with the whole 'burying the hatchet' thing. It was all fine until we went to bed. You see, Aubrey had taken free reign of Kathleen's old bed and had covered it in hair and make up products. So Kathleen moved all of the stuff onto Aubrey's bed where she thought it belonged.

Aubrey decided that since she was gone for so long the bed was no longer rightfully hers (Kathleen's). Whoever claimed it got it, end of story. She explained it like it was and exchange and a Huffelpuff moved in with us and Kathleen tramped right on in and commanded the poor girl to go away and never come back because that bed was _hers_. Kathleen just rolled her eyes and got ready for bed. While Kathleen was taking a bath Aubrey took all of her products and set them neatly on the bed mumbling something about 'no respect'.

Kathleen just patiently moved them onto Aubrey's four-poster, but I could see her face. She was obviously angry. She got in bed and took out a book to read and as soon as she looked settled Aubrey walked in. "YOU MOVED MY STUFF!" she said loudly stomping toward Kathleen who put down her book and looked at Aubrey like a grandmother at a disobedient grandchild.

"One Week is all Dumbledore asks, Aubrey." She folded her arms, "One Week. Too much to ask?"

Aubrey huffed and dramatically turned and flounced to her bed. I rolled my eyes. These two were being so stupid. I hope I was never like that. If I was kill me immediately.

I am going to be going on a camping trip with mum, dad, and petunia. It is supposed to be a "no distractions" type of thing and This diary is considered a distraction in mum's book. She wants me to spend time with family since I have been gone all year. I will write more in one week.

Lily

_**Happy new year! **_

_Review. Click on the OK button below and review. It is right next to the box saying "submit review". It's not that hard. _


	17. Wonderwoman

**Wonderwoman**

Harry looked at Ginny, even though he was fine with his mother's journal now, he just couldn't help but have Ginny do her little "counseling sessions". She was great to have around. She smiled, she talked, she was intelligent, she…walked. She was everything.

Ginny knew that Harry could survive without her explaining every little thing about those entries. From why girls made big deals about things that seemed very small, to 'why would anyone put purple highlights in their hair?' She knew that he just loved having her around. He didn't look at her like he was learning something about girls he looked at her like she was something really special, like she was…Wonderwoman. No not Wonderwoman, an angel. She was divine. With Wonderwoman's superhuman powers making Harry go googly-eyed when she walked in the room. For heaven's sake he would be dying of…something when she would just walk by.

Harry Knew this. He enjoyed it. He liked having a girl know he liked her. With Cho, he had a crush and she really didn't even know. And then she got a boyfriend. Even though she didn't know it, Cho broke his heart. '_Cedric, Cedric Diggory.' _He could still hear her say it. It didn't break his heart anymore. He could flirt with Ginny, and almost Guarantee that she would flirt back. His heart fluttered more with Ginny around then EVER with Cho.

So now when he looked at her, he didn't see Ron's little sister, he saw _her_. He saw the girl who made him feel like a million galleons. And now. Harry saw his mother. He looked at Ginny and he felt like he was with Lily. Learning about Lily with Ginny made him view Ginny differently. But this was almost a bad thing in some cases. Lily did not seem like his mother. She was Ginny. Ginny was Lily. Harry couldn't stand it.

"Er, Ginny?"

"Huh?"

"Have you noticed that we are a bit different after being together everyday? I mean, we are closer then before. You are not Ron's sister any more. Oh. Well you are, but, I mean when I see you I see…"

"Lily." Interrupted Ginny, suddenly looking up from the journal. "I expected that." Harry was taken aback by the quick reply. "We even look the same from people who describe her. I don't think Hermione would have suddenly turned into Lily, you know her very well. So now when you read this I am sure you imagine me saying this, doing that, having a different personality."

"Er, right." Harry shook his head. "The point of that was to explain this, Ginny, Would you like to be my girlfriend? I would like to also know you like you are. If that helps."

Ginny shifted in the place she was sitting. "I will get back to you." She stood up suddenly and walked to the door. "I need to go." She brusquely shut the door and her heard her run up the stairs to her bedroom.

_What was that all about?_

Oo00OO00oO

Ginny fell on her bed. She wanted to yell, "Yes!" at the top of her lungs. But she couldn't. Something was holding her back. She wanted to let Harry know what she is really like. She wanted Harry to know what she was like ever since she was 10! Why couldn't she just say yes?

Ron.

She hated how Ron acted when she got a new boyfriend. He was always a bit hostile to the lucky boy. She didn't know if anything could stop their friendship. But if this did, she wouldn't forgive herself. Ever since her last boyfriend Ron had been over protective, so that would also stop Harry from knowing Ginny. People are different alone rather than with groups of people.

She stared at the ceiling. Harry potter could be her boyfriend. And Ron wasn't the only thing stopping her. Ron would NOT ordinarily be an obstacle. Ron was her stupid big brother who did not understand was only got in the way. he was not the reason, she couldn't believe she even thought he was for a minute.She was stopping herself. But she didn't even know why.

Oo00OO00oO

Harry didn't get it. They were getting along great. He thought that maybe they were ready. The only thing he knew is that he needed to get out of Ron's room (Ron was out de-gnoming the Garden) and do something with himself. He needed to fly. He hadn't gotten out to fly on his broom in a long time, and normally when something was bothering him he would fly to calm his nerves. It made him feel, like nothing, not even his problems could catch him. He was unstoppable if he was on his broom.

With that in mind he grabbed his firebolt and walked downstairs. Mrs. Weasley was already working on the family's dinner. Harry could hear her humming a song that he recognized by a new witch singer "Esmerelda Vine". He slipped out of the kitchen and stepped into the garden. Ron was swinging a gnome around above his head. Harry could hear the gnome squealing. So before Ron would turn to catch another gnome Harry mounted his broom and zoomed off into the air and to a field where Harry, Ron, Fred, George, and Ginny would play Quidditch.

It was great to feel the wind running through his hair. He loved the rush. How could Hermione not like flying? She didn't have to fly very high. She could stay near the ground.

But Harry didn't care about Hermione's flying fear at the moment. He cared about Ginny. He wished so bad that she would look out her window and see him flying alone then join him. But she wouldn't. He knew she wouldn't. To get and answer he would have to wait, maybe days, maybe just hours. But he would have to wait. He would have to wait for Wonderwoman to come and save him.

Oo00OO00oO

Ginny heard Harry leave the house and go to fly. She watched him out her Window. He wasn't doing any fancy flying. He was just doing large circles a little above the clearing. She could tell he was frustrated. She loved to see him be a mess like that. It was hansom. He was so cute when he was stressed, happy, angry, and in Love.

She giggled. Ginny loved the way Harry would look at her. He would stare at her, like she was the only thing in the world. Like she was the most interesting thing. But he was also searching her, trying to figure her out.

Harry flew down into the clearing so she couldn't see him anymore. She knew he was landing so he could walk back to the burrow rather than fly. Ginny had learned about Harry over their talks. She thought about how Harry saw her. Then she realized why she couldn't answer Harry.

Although she hated not being Ginny to him, she _loved _being Lily. Being the missing link. Being something any other girl could never be. Not Cho, Not Hermione, not her mother who saw Harry as her seventh son. Ginny liked it, and she didn't want that to stop.

Oo00OO00oO

Sorry for the short update after a long time. I know it is kind of disappointing. So here is why I took lo long. I have been procrastinating between homework things. And when I finally decided to do it. I found out that I was going to Mexico for a week, 2 ½ hours before I did. So I couldn't exactly update while I was in a different country. So I am sorry I took forever. Forgive me. Review. Send me nasty reviews and make me feel guilty if you have to. Just review.


	18. When a Girls Wants Chocolate

**When a Girl Wants Chocolate…**

At home, in my bedroom 

_Around noon_

I am back from the camping trip that lasted a lifetime. It was BORED. Mum decided listening to "nature's voice" was a fun morning activity everyday. You can only listen to crickets for an hour for so often.

Now that I am back I have been trying to get Mum to let me Go to Aubrey's house for the rest of the summer, everyone else goes to their friend's houses and I stay at home with lovely Petunia and friends. Mom normally gives me a talk like "You spend everyday with them at school, and I can't let you go during the time I have you. What if that train wrecks on the way to school and I didn't get to spend the last 3 months with you? A mother can only go without her daughter for so long. You are staying in London with me and your father." I just spent a week with her without distractions! Maybe I could compromise one or two more weeks, but I need to be with my friends.

Another reason that I need to go see Aubrey is because I want my hair all the same length and color like it was before. I enjoyed rainbow hair for almost 6 months I want my old hair back. Mum doesn't like my multi-colored locks either, she says it is becoming like the world and the world is evil. She has gotten really weird ever since Christmas, or I have changed. But I think it is her, not me. She would have never forced me to listen to nature or complain about how evil this world is. But Mum is nothing to do with it. Do you know how HARD it is to style this think for summer? I can't braid it because there are too many fly-aways, same with Ponytails, half ponytails, and any other cooling style for the summer. I don't like it.

So I am going to go ask Mum if I can go, again. It may not help my cause to ask her many times, but I have got to try.

Lily

In the Dining Room 

_3:00 pm_

She said that I am being disrespectful of her love for me. I don't understand! Why won't she let me be with my friends? Good relationships are definitely more important than staying at home being bored. Oh, great now I am being a horrible rebellious teenager. Kill me.

Lily

In my Bedroom 

_9:00 pm_

Wow, I was miss attitude for a minute there. But seriously, parents drive me nuts. I don't get practice dealing with them the entire year. Professors are one thing, but parents are completely different. So it is different. Professors don't hunt you down to tell you that they love you. Professors don't knock on your door to have a small talk when they think something is wrong with your attitude and how to change it. Professors make sure you obey the rules and grade you. That's it. End of story.

So I don't know how to deal with someone who cares for you (not for general you, your _well-being_) So, now yeah. That is how I feel. I have been moody. But that is because of female problems. I leave it at that. I don't usually get moody. Maybe it is because I haven't had chocolate yet. Up at Hogwarts I have a stash of chocolate frogs to keep me from biting off everyone's heads. (It was Kathleen's idea at first to do that.) So I am not going to be writing a lot. I can't believe this house's lack of chocolate!

Lily

In my bedroom 

_9:00 am_

I have been being really psycho lately. I sent out a plea to all of my friends for chocolate so I won't be so weird. I hope.

Mum was telling me a couple minutes ago that she is going on a retreat with her friends to a spa because dad is going to a Lawyers convention. So I get to go to a friend's, so whoever sends me chocolate first gets to deal with me. Unless I don't want to go to whoever sends some first. We'll see. Anyway, I have discovered a stash of chocolate in the freezer: chocolate chips. So I am having some, but chocolate frogs do MUCH better. It's like magic.

So I am going to go for a walk. Maybe I will stop by the corner store for some ice cream, or I'll just walk.

Lily.

In the Kitchen 

_Noon_

Petunia has a horrible new boyfriend. His name is _Vernon_. Who names their poor child Vernon? And he is very… no need to be nice. He is obese. He is smelly. He is rude. He is rich. And he is a bully. An obese, smelly, rude, rich, bully is whom my sister decides to date. He is all she talks about. "Vernon was telling me about…" "Vernon pans to…" "Vernon and I are going to…" For heavens sake Petunia, _get a life. _I hope I wasn't that bad!The biggest part of it is how He is in college and is attending a university. That makes him SO much better. He plans on making drills for a living. No offense to anyone who lives off of drills. But after growing up around wizards you see how stupid they are. Of course he is a muggle, he doesn't know any better. Now I am looking down on muggles! I am basically a muggle myself. I am sounding like a prejudiced pureblood pig! Kill me. There is a war in the Wizarding world over this and I am being as stupid al that horrible man running around killing people over this.

I feel bad. Well I have decided to go to Kathleen's house it might make things up from this school year. I hope. Maybe I could get Aubrey and Kathleen together and get them to make up! I have big plans with this!

I need to write Kathleen a letter to see if I can go to her house, I am so excited. Then I need to write Christopher a letter, I have almost neglected him this summer.

Lily


	19. Owl Post

**Owl Post**

At Kathleen's Ranch 

_Noon_

I am at Kathleen's for the rest of the summer. She lives on a ranch far away from the city. Actually she doesn't even live on the British Isles. She lives by the border of France, and she only goes to Hogwarts because her mother told her she had to. So if I want to go to Diagon Alley I have to go to special stations to I may take a small portkey across the water. It is a really complicated process really.

I had to ride the knight bus to a Floo Station in London which flooed me to one next to the Atlantic Ocean. Then Flooed out to I have no idea where then used a portkey to get to another floo station from there I flooed to Kathleen's. I hope that they discover better ways to travel or at least find better or stronger spells to use to transport people. I can't imagine traveling to Germany or someplace! That would not be very fun. It would stop me from traveling anyway. I read in a book once that before Wizards discovered portkeys and floo powder they had to use muggle transportation. So I guess I am luckier then they were in the past. Still.

I now have a huge stock of chocolate frogs. They are in a corner of my trunk and I am getting a larger collection of Chocolate frog cards. They are very interesting. Kathleen says I have gotten boring over the long time we were apart. Oh well. I have never bee to Kathleen's house before this. She has three sisters and a brother.

Audra: He eldest sister, works at a Gringott's bank in a local town. She looks more like Kathleen's mom then Kathleen. She has short, wavy, sandy blonde hair and big blue eyes. She is very cute and petite. She is a bit shorter than myself. And is very thin. She has a little nose splattered with freckles. I notice very odd things I guess.

Lydianne: Just a couple years older than Kathleen. She finished Hogwarts two years ago and is studying to be an Auror. She is a bit taller than Audra and is almost identical to Kathleen. The only difference is her round green eyes, much like my own.

Julie: 8 years old. She looks nothing like her sisters. She is definitely going to be tall. (She is already as tall as me, and I am a couple inches taller than the older sisters) She has very bright blonde hair. She has Lydianne's eyes and is fair skinned, unlike her sisters who all have freckles covering their cheeks and noses. She talks a lot and already has a boyfriend, the neighbor boy Jack. His older brother was Kathleen's first specimen, the first boy to be written on her legendary list.

Kyle: 12 years old has sandy blonde hair. He is as tall as his younger sister and the two are identical in almost every way besides their hair. They have the same shape of face and eyes and the same skin.

She has like 20 pets though, even though they are outside, it is very…odd. I have never had any pets in my life. She has, let me think…8 cats, 4 dogs, 3 rabbits, and 2 horses. Oh! And 4 Owls. I don't know all of their names. They don't need names. I am not a pet person. They are cat. Dog. Rabbit. And Owl. I like horses, so they are fine. Lola and Herbie. Lola is Audra and Lydianne's horse. Herbie is Kathleen and Julie's. Kyle has all the dogs. Ugh. I hate dogs. They are big, they bark, and… eugh!

So now you have seen a side of me you haven't seen before! I wrote Christopher a letter. I told him how much I miss him and that we need to get together. He wrote back. So I am going to post his letters in here like I did his "secret admirer" letters. It will be like old times, before my dreams came true.

_Lily_

_I miss you too. _

_So, uh, this Thursday is my birthday and I was wondering if I could get together with you at Diagon Alley. It would be fun. We could look at books if you want to, we can get some butterbeers at the leaky cauldron, Ice cream. Who knows how much fun we could have? So write me back with your reply. _

Christopher 

Not as Romantic as his secret admirer letters, but he won me, right? So I can't wait until Thursday! I am going to see if there is an easier way to get to Diagon Alley. There better be! Isn't Christopher the best boyfriend ever? His special birthday wish is to spend it with me, and me alone. How sweet. I guess that makes up for the lack of Romance in his letter.

Lily

(He hasn't called me "My Lily Flower" ever since those letters, I wonder why not! I always thought that was so sweet!)

In Kathleen's Room 

_9:00 pm_

I spent all yesterday trying to find easier way to get to Diagon Alley, I was writing letters like a maniac to people who could help. To the travel department in the Ministry of Magic, to the Floo Station Directors, to as many people as possible, I wrote so many letters! I worked from about 9:00 am to 3:00 pm before Kathleen asked me what I was doing.

I explained what I was doing Saturday and how I didn't want to spend forever at the Floo stations and she laughed at me. She thought my dilemma was silly. I was slightly hurt, until I realized that this meant there was an easier way to get to Diagon Alley.

Turns out that Kathleen's family has special designated portkeys from the ministry because of the distance they live from Diagon Alley and Hogwarts. It can be used over and over to get from there and back. She said that I could use hers. Because she thinks it is a worthy cause we are making a special trip to the local muggle village to shop for some clothes to wear for my date! We are also going to get my hair back to normal the muggle way, just a trim to get it all one length.

We are leaving tomorrow morning at 7: 00 am and we have to be home by 2:00 pm. I think that that is enough time to shop and get my hair trimmed. So I am going to get some sleep. I am so excited. I get to see Christopher and I am getting new clothes just for the occasion!

Lily

In Kathleen's Room 

_5:00 pm_

I just got back! Shopping was so much fun! I haven't gone shopping around muggles in a while. I loved it. When we got Ice cream for lunch (we were in charge, and no one told us what we were allowed and not allowed to get…) Kathleen was eating it very sloooowly and it began to melt and she had no clue what was happening! She was standing in the middle of the street screaming because it dripped on her shirt. "It's sticky!" was what she kept repeating over and over again. She was HILARIOUS! Everyone was staring! When she finally calmed down she saw a really cute guy and insisted on following him around for a half an hour before he yelled at us in French. Kathleen (who is fortunate enough to speak fluent French) told me that he was telling us that we were stalkers. She didn't know what he meant and when I told her she said that if muggles need a special name for people following other people around like stalkers do, then we all have big problems.

Well I bought about 3 outfits, I don't know which one I want to wear. There is one back tank top, with a matching jean skirt that goes about 3 inches above my knees. The tank top has thin red lace that goes around the edges. And there is a big heart on the front. The Second outfit is a pink button up shirt with a pair of khaki slacks (mostly so I can have new clothes for school it isn't really a choice for my date with Christopher) The last pair of clothes is pretty good too. It is a short-sleeved bark blue shirt it fits me tight around my waste so I look pretty good. The pants are jeans, it is a new look and jeans are pretty expensive, so I am proud of my only pair of jeans. I got two new pairs of shoes, some tennis shoes and some nicer shoes for school.

I got my OWL results! I passed every class! Yes! I got another letter from Christopher. This one is somehow less romantic then the last.

_Lily_

_Cool, see ya Thursday noon at Leaky cauldron._

_Love ya_

_Christopher_

How disappointing!

Lily


	20. Happy Birthday To Who?

**Happy Birthday to… who?**

In Kathleen's Room 

_Midnight_

Well, I went and saw Christopher. I will tell you all about it. I used Kathleen's portkey to go there without the fuss. I decided to wear the jean skirt and tank top. I got there and Christopher was already there in the Leaky cauldron. He had bought me a butterbeer and was sitting at a table alone and in the center of the table was a small vase with a single rose, very romantic looking. He ordered us some food, I don't remember what actually, I was concentrating on Christopher. He seemed different and I couldn't put my finger on it. He was acting all sweet, but there was something sour beneath it all.

After that we went to all sorts of stores. He bought me a book, "The Muggle World" by Mischa Epperson. I thought that was also a bittersweet thing to do, Sweet he bought it, but I know everything about muggles already! He was also acting weird, almost a bit...nervous. We went and got ice cream. We saw the newest broom, shooting star. Christopher spent almost an hour in the Quidditch store. He was acting like a little boy on Christmas pointing things out to his mummy that he just _needs_.

We weren't the only people from Hogwarts there. James Potter and all of his entourage were there too. I saw them when we were in Filibuster's. I pretty much tried to ignore them. Although James wouldn't stop flirting with me! It was very annoying, and I was with my boyfriend.

When it was about 6: 30 he took me back to the Leaky cauldron. I had a salad. He had a big piece of chicken with mashed potatoes. I don't remember what we talked about because he was acting odder then he had been the entire day! After that he said he wanted to take another walk around Diagon Alley before I left.

He told me a lot of things about himself, about how much he loved me. He told me that he thought we were meant for each other. I was soaking it all up. We went back into an alley and we kissed. We kissed passionately. He was running his hands up and down my curves. I didn't even notice we kept kissing. My head was spinning. It was a wonderful sensation that was running through my veins. I felt happy, like my every fantasy was being fulfilled. Then suddenly I was slapped back to reality by a force that I still don't know what it was.

Christopher was holding me a bit firmer then he was before and with only one hand. I began to go back into my stupor caused by his tongue gently rubbing my lips. I didn't even realize what the hand he wasn't holding me with was doing.

Christopher had grabbed my skirt and was slowly and gently moving it down my hips and thighs. I didn't realize that he had stopped concentrating on our wonderful kiss. He was starting to take me down to the ground with him. My skirt was to my knees and then I realized it. Christopher was holding me tighter then ever, I couldn't move. I tried to break my lips away from his but he had forced my head back so I couldn't move my head well. I began to squirm. But my skirt was making it difficult. I tried to punch him, but he had taken control of my arms. He began to roll so he would be on top of me.

I bit him. I finally opened my mouth to let his tongue in, and when it began to touch mine I bit. And I bit him hard. He jumped and broke his mouth away. He loosened his arms and I took the chance to pull my skirt up to where it should be. I punched him in the stomach and I kicked him where it would hurt _most. _He groaned. I tried to roll away from him but he grabbed my legs. I screamed, loud.

Christopher pulled me by my legs back to him and then he went for my shirt. He yanked it up so that is was covering my face and my scream was slightly muffled. So Again I kicked him before he could lock me again, right where it hurts. He began to curl on the ground and I jumped up. I turned and was about to run before Christopher grabbed my legs. The last thing I saw before I slammed my head on the ground and passed out was James potter running as fast as he could at Christopher and me.

I woke up about five minutes later, I think. I was inside, I someone's arms. "Lil'?" they asked. It was a gentle caring voice, obviously that of a boy, and obviously a teenager, "Are you alright Lil'?" I cracked open my eyelids. It was James. He was stroking my hair and muttering things, sweet things, to me. It was like he was talking to a sleeping baby.

"Where am I?" I asked, trying to sit up.

He pushed me back down. "You've gotten a minor concussion, stay laying down." He began stroking my hair, "You are in the leaky cauldron. In a hotel room." I made a face at him and he looked away. "People were staring." He explained.

I tried to sit up again but he forced me down. "So," I began, "how much did you see?"

"Everything from you biting him to you becoming unconscious." He stopped stroking my hair and looked at me square in the eyes. "Are you okay?"

I began to twiddle my fingers since I obviously wasn't going to be moving anytime soon. "I'm not sure. I just can't get over the fact that it was Christopher. He wrote me letters before he got together with me. He was so nice then. I was falling in love before he became my boyfriend. I mean. I was his Lily Flower." James eyes did a little flash and he began stroking my hair again. He has such gentle hands. "He wasn't nearly that romantic in person, but I always liked people who could write well. I loved the little poems and clues. I enjoyed it, like a little girl on Christmas. It was a fun game. Who was Lily's Secret Admirer?" I laughed a little and sort of relaxed. "I can't believe he was using me for his own evil intentions."

Then it hit me. My Christopher was no longer my Christopher. He was a disgusting pervert. He tried to rape me. He didn't succeed, but he tried. "I'm sorry." James said. He had tears in his eyes. I thought that was so sweet. James was crying for me. I wish all boys were that sweet. "I'm sorry I didn't come and save you sooner. I could have run up and gotten you away from that, filth. But no, I just stood there. I let you get hurt more then you could have. You wouldn't have ended up with a concussion at least." He turned his head away so I couldn't see his face. "It's all my fault anyway."

"No, James. It is not your fault Christopher did that." I touched his cheek, but he turned it away further. "No Lil'. It is. I am the reason Christopher even _got _to you." He looked at me again. Tears were running down his face. "I was the secret Admirer. I wrote you those letters. I wanted to take you to the ball. I could have stopped him from getting you. I was about to walk in and see you during your first meal with him. But I heard you two talking. You were with him. And I didn't want to stop you, in fear that I might chase you away. But chasing you away could not have been worse then this! I would have ended up hurt before, but you were hurt worse. I can never forgive myself."

I sat up. This time he didn't stop me. "That is the sweetest thing that anyone has ever said to me James." I stood up. Everything was spinning but I needed to get back to Kathleen's ranch. "I need to go. Thank you, James. I really do mean it. Thank you. But I must go."

"Okay. But stay off you feet at least." James stood and picked me up, "I'll take you down to the fireplace."

"No, I have a special portkey that will take me straight to where I need to go. Don't worry. I'll be fine."

He put me down on the bed. I stood up and I took the portkey out of my pocket. I adjusted the end of the golden stick (which is what the portkey looks like) and just before I was whirling around to the ranch I heard james say "I Love you Lily."

Lily


	21. Confidence

**Confidence**

_Kathleen's Room_

_Noon_

It has been a long time since I wrote last. It has been about a month. I have had a birthday, so I am now 16. And I am miserable. I hate my life. WHY DID HE DO THAT? WHAT POSSESSED HIM TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF ME? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? I haven't told anyone. Not even Kathleen. I only told her that Christopher and I broke up, to say in the least. She pitied me, but she doesn't understand why I am so depressed. She keeps saying "For heaven's sake Lil! He was only a _boy_!" No Kath, he was a disgusting, slimy, horrible pervert.

James has written me three letters. One a day after the incident, promising that he would tell no one, one on my birthday with a gift of very pretty stationary, and a third yesterday asking me how I was doing. I have given short sweet replies. I hope he doesn't expect more.

We are going back to Hogwarts in a week. So I am going back to Diagon Alley tomorrow. I hope I don't break down. I am not writing a lot because I just don't have the energy, so I will explain my trip to Diagon Alley in my next entry.

Lily

In the Garden 

_3:00 pm_

I went. I got my supplies. I saw Sandra and Aubrey. We talked for a bit, Sandra noticed that I was a little "under the weather". When she said that I laughed a little. I saw James also. He waved at me and winked, but I just smiled.

I saw Christopher. He was there with an older taller version of him that I think was his older brother. I almost died when I saw him. He ignored me after he gave me a weird expression after I glared at him. "What's the matte with you Lil?' asked Kathleen, "Most people are sometimes even friendly with their ex! Why are you glaring at him?"

"He let me go pretty hard." Was all I said before hurrying into the bookshop. They three decided that I as acting pretty weird and bugged me all day. Sandra kept trying to get me to talk to her about my feelings. Aubrey told me that kissing other guys seem to help her and that I needed a guy to kiss. But the incident happened while I was kissing a guy that would make me feel worse. Kathleen told me to shape up and get over it.

Yeah Great friends huh?

Lily

In the barn 

_Noon_

So now Kathleen told her entire household about how weird I am acting. So I am hiding from her mother, who is convinced I need someone to talk to. I know I do, but not to someone else's mother! Besides, I've finally talked to someone already.

Not Kathleen. Audra. She sort of hunted me down, and found me. I was in the barn like I am now. I am willing to hang around the animals in order to get away from Kath and the rest of the family. Audra walked right to where I was hiding as if she was following me! She sat in the straw right next to me. And looked me right in the eye and said "He took advantage of you didn't he?"

I was shocked. How in the world did she know? I mean seriously! Was I really that obvious? I was hoping to make it out as my first break up. I asked her how she knew and Audra stood and looked around the barn for a second before sitting down closer to me. "You're not the only girl to have that happen to her." She whispered, "So who's the bloody git?"

"Christopher Hopkins" I said sadly.

Audra fell over and gasped. "It runs in the family." She sighed. "The horrible ugly vampire who hurt me was Jackob Hopkins. He is Christopher's big brother. Christopher was only 6 when Jake raped me. He was so cute. He had big eyes, fat cheeks. He caught his older brother in the act, and sadly, wasn't surprised. I was so sad for the poor little boy."

I suddenly felt so sorry for Christopher. But I didn't know what I was going to do. Christopher was also taught to do it to many girls if Audra wasn't lying. I don't want other girls to go through what I went through, but I don't want to run off and tattle tale. What if Christopher got mad and tried to hurt me for telling? Oh!

Lily

In Kathleen's Room 

_9:00 pm_

I have decided that I am not afraid of Christopher. He is a horrible boy who, I hope, hasn't gotten another girl. That would be horrible. I would feel like it was my fault if I heard about it. So I am going to go and tell Professor McGonagall when I get back to Hogwarts. She would know what to do I hope.

Audra promised she wouldn't tell anyone what happened because she said she understood that I would feel stupid and didn't want people to think I was weak. Now that I have told someone I feel more like myself though. And Kathleen is not bugging me as much about being too weird. Which is very good. So I am going back to Hogwarts in half a week. I can't wait. I want to see James and thank him for what he did that night.

Well I need to got to bed, I am so tired. I haven't slept well in so long.

Lily.


	22. Boys are Retarded

**Boys are Retarded**

**Ginny's POV**

Ginny walked down to Ron's room to see Harry. She knew that he had read the entry with Christopher's attack. She giggled as he threw the journal at the wall and crossed his arms. "I hope Christopher is tortured slowly to death. Or decapitated like bloody Nick then forced to be a ghost forever and can't be part of the headless hunt."

"Well, then you won't be disappointed when I tell you that he was tortured then killed by Voldemort exactly a year before you mother and father were murdered by the same horrible fiend." Ginny picked up the journal and smoothed out a wrinkled page before handing it back. Harry grunted.

"I'd hope I would be the one to torture him." He muttered sourly. Ginny laughed lightly. Harry sat up and faced Ginny, "Has anything like that ever happened to you?" he looked sincerely concerned.

"No."

"Hermione?"

"Not that I know of."

"I need to ask her." He stood up and was about to walk out of the room before Ginny grabbed him by the back of his shirt and pulled him back.

She sat him down and began to massage his shoulders, "You can ask her later, and if she was you can go be Mr. Superhero and mercilessly torture that evil. But first I want to ask you some questions." He fell over and groaned. Ginny laughed and lay next to him. "Oh come on, it's not that bad!" He turned his head and looked at her. She smiled at him and turned toward him. "Why would a boy do that to a girl?"

He folded his arms over his chest and said, "Because boys are retarded."

Ginny punched him on the shoulder, "Seriously, you are right though. Only a retarded boy would call boys retarded, and you are most definitely retarded."

"Hey! That's not nice!"

"You brought it upon yourself. Now tell me the answer."

"Manly lust." He said sounding like a dizzy two-year-old.

Ginny stood up frustrated with the idiot lump she was trying to talk to. "Oh Manly lust eh? What's so _manly_ about it?"

He sat up and put on a semi-serious face. "Hmmm…"

"No wait!" sad Ginny before he could say anything, "Don't answer that. Just tell me WHO WOULD DO THAT TO A GIRL!" She was about to grab him and begin shaking him back and forth until his puny little head popped off. "And answer seriously. Another question, why are you suddenly taking this so lightly? You wanted to murder Christopher two seconds ago, now you are treating the situation like you drank way too much butter beer and you were actually getting slightly drunk!"

"You can get drunk off butterbeer?"

"If you drink like 20 bottles, but that's not the point." She pulled him off the bed, "answer me!"

Harry smiled. "I love it when you are angry." He sighed. Ginny threw him at the bed and kicked him in the shins, "I'll tell you if I can go ask Hermione."

She yelled and kicked him again. "Fine go, but I want a _good _answer!"

OoOO00OOoO

Ginny fell onto her bed and sighed. It was so cute how Harry was making sure that her and Hermione were "safe" from rape. He seemed to be fine about his mum, but she would have him talk to him about it later. She giggled. He was so weird sometimes, like now.

Why couldn't he answer her question? Maybe he doesn't know… but that can't be! He's a guy! He is BOUND to have perverted thoughts! Even girls have some pervert-ish thoughts! Everyone does!

_I wonder how sweet he would be as a boyfriend. Would he be like James and hold me and care for me when I am hurt? _Ginny got the butterflies thinking about a boy loving her that much! She had visions of being picked up and swung around. Then kissed on the lips. She knew it was a weird fantasy. But She liked envisioning Harry being the one to do it. Maybe he was Mr. Perfect.

OoOO00OOoO

Harry waked back in to Ron's room after hunting down Hermione then asking her the question. Ginny was still lying on Harry's bed. "Negative or positive?"

"What?"

Ginny sighed and sat up, "Yes or no."

"No." Harry sat down on the bed next to Ginny. "She probably won't leave me alone now. 'Why do you ask?' 'Is it something with your mother?' 'Oh Harry just tell me!'" he was making his voice go high pitch trying to imitate her, "It is going to be so horrible." Harry lay down and sighed.

Ginny got off the bed and pulled up a big wooden chair to the bed. "Throw away my first question Harry, I want to ask you another question that I want you to answer." She leaned forward, "What do you think about he whole thing with your mother being raped?"

"Almost." He grunted angrily.

"Okay, almost raped. What do you think about it?"

He rolled over so he was facing Ginny. "I can't believe that that happened to _my_ mother. If this is what brings my parents together that doesn't even make it right in my eyes. I shouldn't even have been born if it is the result of that horrible thing that that horrible piece of dung did to her."

Ginny laughed. "You sound ridiculous."

"Do not."

"Do to. Don't argue." She got back on the bed. "Sit up. I am going to massage your shoulders, you must be tense."

"Thanks." He sat up and began to talk to Ginny. About how he despised men who would do that to women. He said he would never do that to a girl even if he were put under the strongest imperious curse. He just wanted to kill any boy who thought of women as objects not people. "I knew people did that type of thing, Aunt petunia and Uncle Vernon were talking to each other once late at night about what they should do because petunia thought that her duddy-kins was having bad thoughts about women. I hated it. I wanted to go up and murder Dudley if I knew it would make me feel better. And then I was at Muggle School and a girl I really liked was talking to the counselor about how she was sexually abused by her father. The councilor told the teachers who told parents, who told kids. I was so sad. I wanted to kill the father and also the counselor for telling everyone. And..." he kept talking. Harry was getting all worked up about the entire thing. He was so cute. "And now I know this happened to my _mother?_ I can't believe that that happened. Why did she let that happen? HOW? I mean if I were her I would…"

"Stop there." Said Ginny, "I am glad you are not sexist and all but _calm down_. Calm down now. It is okay. At least I know how you feel. Read the journal and maybe you will feel better. Maybe.

Harry didn't say anything but laid down and grumbled, "That's nice Ginny, but now I just need rest."

"I understand." She said before shutting the door.

_Most boys are completely retarded. 'What's wrong with that? It's not like I'll get caught!' I wish all boys were like Harry. Or maybe I am just biased._


	23. Sweet Nothings

**Sweet Nothings**

_In the Common Room_

_9:00 pm_

It rained today. I was quiet all day. I didn't really talk to anyone. I have nothing else to say.

Oh. I hate Christopher. Just so you know.

Lily

_In the Common Room_

_9:00 pm (two weeks later)_

I haven't written in a while. Haven't felt like it. I don't even feel like it now. I didn't realize how much I was living for Christopher until I came back to Hogwarts. I loved being his girlfriend. He would look at me, smile at me, hold my hand, and kiss me on the cheek and the neck, and sometimes a tiny peck on the lips, nothing big. He would do just enough to make me feel good. Just enough.

I hate Christopher.

Lily

_In the Common Room_

_3:00 am_

I keep having nightmares of men coming after me. Then suddenly I hear Christopher saying, "It's Okay Lily, just stay _right there_." in a sly sounding sneer of a voice. Then he grabs me and did what he did in that alley. I always wake up crying. I just wish in the dreams James would come and save me again.

I feel like I'm all alone.

Lily

_In Potions_

_3:30pm_

Professor Slughorn was the first teacher to notice that something was wrong. He took me aside before he started class. I told him I was feeling a bit sick but I was well enough to come to class. He gave me a reproachful look and sent me back to my seat.

James kept staring at me with concern on his face. I saw him scribble something on a piece of parchment then he folded it up and sent it at me. I screamed and tried to dodge it. But it still managed to hit me square in the forehead. Everyone but James and me laughed. I was so embarrassed. James looked really sorry. Professor Slughorn gave me the oddest look and continued to teach.

I picked up the note and it read:

_Dear Lily Flower_

_Do you mind that I call you "My Lily Flower" still? I hope not, because that is what you are. You are _My_ Lily Flower, so I hope you don't mind. I was just writing to tell you that I can tell you are very sad, and if you need to talk to someone without telling them what happened I am here._

_ I Love You._

_James_

Aww How sweet. But I don't want to talk to anyone I just want to shrivel up and die.

Lily

_In The Common Room_

_9:00pm_

I wrote James back. Told him that I thought that was sweet and all but I didn't need to talk to anyone. I wish people would leave me alone. I am fine. Nothing is wrong with me. No one understands.

Lily

_In the Girl's Dormitories_

_2:00 am_

I had another nightmare. It was like the others only this time the older boy, the one I saw with him at Diagon Alley, was coming at me with a knife. It was terrifying. I woke up screaming. So now everyone else is back asleep. But I can't. Oh, Diary what do I do?

Lily

_In The Great hall_

_Lunch_

_Lily_

_No Lily, I know that something is wrong, you are very sad and you are not being yourself. I saw what happened in that alley and I know you are broken and scarred from it. I love it when you smile and laugh. It is so beautiful. Please talk to someone, even if it isn't me. I want to see you even get angry with me if it means you are yourself again! Please Lily! I am begging you! _

_I love you_

_James_

He doesn't understand either. I just can't! I am afraid to tell Professor McGonagall, and I am afraid to tell my friends. I am not telling a stupid childish boy how I feel! Especially James Potter.

Lily

_In the Common Room_

_9:00pm_

He wrote back again. I am not pasting it in here. It is just about a line so I will write them here on my own.

_Or I will get help for you. I love you and that is why I care._

Man he is so sweet. I wish he were doing it under different circumstances.

Lily

_In the Girl's Dormitories_

_7:00 am_

I had another nightmare. I am not going to describe it. It was worse than the others. But now I realize how much I do care for James. He went and told Dumbledore. Christopher was expelled from Hogwarts, and all the other magical schools were warned. I am so happy. I won't see him in the halls and get flooding memories. But I still don't want to talk to James. And getting Christopher kicked out won't change the past.

You know James notes are like sweet nothings that a boy whispers in your ear. Sweet little things that make your heart soar and things that make you feel truly in love. I like James, but isn't it early for sweet nothings?

No. It's not.

Lily


	24. What I've been Wating For

**What I've Been Waiting For**

_In the Common Room_

_8:00 am_

The nightmares have stopped some. They are less often and if I have them, (now I am blushing). James saves me in the end. I am falling in love with dream James. Maybe it is because he is so sweet to me in his Sweet Nothings. I don't know. Christopher got accepted into Durmstrang. I was a bit unhappy for a while, but then I decided that as long as he wasn't around _me_ I was fine for the time being. I just hope that no one befalls his seductive ways.

I have been at Hogwarts now for 3 months, and James hasn't asked me to be his girlfriend once. I guess he's just being sensitive to my feelings. But I guess it made me feel special. I don't know. I sort of miss it.

Lily

_In the Common Room_

_9:00 am_

It is a Saturday and I have no homework! So now I am at a loss about what to do. The next Hogsmede weekend is in a month and I don't know if I am even going to go. Maybe I could get a good book to read. I don't know. I hate Christopher. He killed me on the inside.

Lily

_In the Girl's Bathroom (second Floor)_

_9:00 pm_

I know I am in here after curfew, but I had to get away. So I am in moaning Myrtle's bathroom. She keeps talking to me. Doesn't she see that I want to be alone? Ghosts are so insensitive. She thinks that I am possessed because I start crying randomly, but it is not my fault! I haven't had a good cry in such a long time! Not since I hid in the barn at Kathleen's ranch after Aubrey left. I have heard it is good to cry to get my feelings out.

The only reason that I even go in the stupid bathroom is because I know no one in their right mind would go in there. But I have decided to talk about James. He is being so, not normal to me. He hasn't even asked me out yet! I miss it! Why wont he? Come on James! What if I actually said yes? It may help me to feel loved by another boy, I don't know. But I wouldn't mind being James's Girlfriend now!

But why James, of all people?

Lily

_In The Common Room_

_9:00 pm_

It's seems that I can only write at nine o clock! Look at the entries! Most of them are at nine! Am I really so pathetic? I am too predictable. Oh well. I could care less at the moment. It's almost November. I haven't been inspired to write in a while, so I will catch you up.

Everyone seems to have gotten used to my new closed up self. My more frequent mood swings still annoy my friends, but I can't really help it. There was a seventh year boy who asked me to be his girlfriend, I was so close to just going with it because I want to feel loved, but that wouldn't be true to the poor guy, and I couldn't do that to him. So I explained to him that I would in a heartbeat if I thought that we would go anywhere, and that if there is another dance or banquet I would go as a date with him (if he was the FIRST to ask), but I couldn't commit to a relationship. I wanted to let him down easy. (He was also not so easy to look at, he needs teeth straightened and eyebrows plucked in the least. He could also do with a diet and acne treatment.) So I hope we don't have a dance or banquet any time soon.

James still hasn't even asked me to go with him to Hogsmede! Oh I miss it like crazy! Hurry up James! He still tells me that he thinks I am the most beautiful thing in the world though. I think that asking me out would follow right after that you know?

The only other new thing is that Aubrey is convinced I need new hair again. I do not agree. She is not getting me with her dyes and scissors again! No way! Last time I got a haircut like that, I got Christopher. I am not going to risk it! Okay, I know that my hair was not the reason I got Christopher, but I just would feel awkward.

Lily

_In the Common Room_

_7:00pm_

It's been about two weeks, and nothing has happened. Kathleen has decided that she won't make a list she will just see how many guys she can date before she turns 17. She will not give up! Her fascination with boys is kind of disturbing! What if she gets a guy like Christopher? Oh I can't take it! Now every guy I see is a possible rapist! I hate Christopher. It's like a poison that once it reaches one part of you, every part is affected. He got me innocence now my life follows. Oh man. I want to kill him.

James has still not asked me. I miss it so much! I took advantage of his affection. And now that it is gone I don't know what I am going to do!

Lily

_In The Girl's Dormitories_

_5:00 am_

I decided that I needed a long relaxing bath so I got up extra early so I could take as long as I wanted. I am waiting for the water to fill the tub now. I have heard about the prefect's bathroom and I wish I could use that one, but this plain bath with one option of bubbles will do.

So James wrote me a letter

_My Lily Flower_

_You still look so sad! I hurts me when you hurt! I was wondering if you would like to go with me to the next Hogsmede outing. We could do some Christmas shopping (less than a month until that blessed Holiday already!) get some butterbeer and do whatever else, as long as a lengthy stop at Zonkos is on the to do list. _

_Tell me your answer via owl. I just cannot contain my excitement! Answer me quickly! Don't make me wait!_

_I love you!_

_James_

Just what I have been waiting for! Kill me now, just in case I am never this happy again!

Lily


	25. The Date

**The Date**

_In the Common Room_

_6:00pm_

I'm back. I loved it. I am now James Potter's girlfriend. He is much better than Christopher, but I am definitely going to keep my distance from things like kissing. But I can still be sweet. If he really loves me he can live without my lips. It could be sort of a test. How does James do with out a kiss every other second? I love being a girlfriend again. It is different than being Christopher's toy. Now that I think about it, I was used more as entertainment. If we ever talked he would get this bored look and his eyes would glaze over. He only seemed enjoy being with me when we were kissing. I didn't even take a hint.

While we were at Hogsmede James was so sweet. We got to ride alone in a carriage while we talked, he made sure of it. He didn't bring up my past relationship and was just finding out about my life and my friends, like he knew nothing about what had happened. I liked that. When we got to Hogsmede h got out of the carriage first then took my hand and helped me out. He put his hand around my waist and led me around, like his prized possession. Making sure that I was not hungry or thirsty, always looking out for me. Once when he saw a puddle he picked me up and said, "I didn't want to risk you accidentally walking in it." Although it was on the other side of the street!

We first went to Honeydukes and got candy. They had the best choices! There was tons of Lollipops of so many different flavors. I had been there before but it felt like the first time because I was there with James. He showed me all of his favorites, most of them I had never noticed or even cared about. He got me samples of different chocolates and chews. He bought me a huge lollipop the flavor of cinnamon and then got one that looked like cinnamon that when you licked it your tongue would swell a bit and get really hot. "You don't mind me buying pranks right?"

"What prank? I don't see a prank!" I said smiling at him.

Then we went to Zonkos and got tons of tricks. There was a ton of things that I thought were so weird like a hat that made your head disappear, and a pair of cloves that made you stick to things you touched. Other things were revolting a hat that made your ears shrivel up, and itching powder that made every part of you itch for 3 hours with no counter curse. James got some of that and bought me the hat that made my head disappear.

Then we went to the bookstore, and I got one book. A novel about a 16-year-old witch with no training from the 16th century who had to go and hunt dragons for their scales and stuff like that. I know it doesn't sound realistic, but that is the appeal! James got a book called "Charms to heal Every Day ailments" for his mother and a book called "100 years ago: The Ministry" for his father. He got some Zonkos stuff for Sirius. I didn't find out because I didn't even want to know. Then some candy for his other friends.

Then we went to the tree broomsticks and got some butterbeers and I got some sticky buns to take to Kathleen who got sick suddenly last night. We talked about this and that, nothing big and important. Then He asked me this "So do you think it would be okay to stay my girlfriend? I understand if you are not ready and all."

I was shocked. He was too sweet. "Yes, I would love to thank you very much."

"G…good." He seemed shocked. "Wow."

"What?"

He shook his head. "You finally said yes. I finally have Lilly Evans as my girlfriend! After trying so hard. I…I can't believe it!"

"I guess I should have been raped earlier, huh?"

"NO. Do NOT say that. DO NOT" he said sternly.

"Okay." I took a drink of my butterbeer. "Why not?"

"I cannot let that be the reason we got together. If that is the reason, then we might as well break up now. I helped you after that, but if that is the only reason we are together, like you see it as you helping me since I helped you then leave."

"No James." I said, feeling very foolish for letting that happen, "No, when you did that I got to see the side of you that I now love, the caring side. And because I learned that side, I can appreciate your naughty side."

He leaned back, "Naughty, eh?"

"Yes, very, very naughty." I smiled devilishly at him.

"I never thought I would be considered naughty." Then he smiled, "I like it. I need to tell Sirius that one."

Then our conversation continued like that. We talked about our families. I talked about life as a muggle. He asked me questions like "Do they really use electity?" I told him they have never heard of 'electity' but it is common to use electricity. He would ask other silly questions that I would answer and if I wasn't wearing a watch, we would have missed the carriages.

I am so happy. There are so many things different between James and Christopher. And I am so glad. I don't know how long I am from recovery, if I do, but I am so happy that James will help me. Because I am now well on my way. I love James.

Hmm, Mrs. Lily Potter. I like it. But who said we would even go that far!

Lily


	26. Simply Love You

**Simply Love You**

In the Common Room 

_8:00 pm_

I am in the best of moods. It is hard to explain even. I am PMSing, I have no chocolate, and yet I am happy. I even got a "Dreadful" on my history of Magic paper. I could care less, I am just happy. Even giddy! What is wrong with me? I don't know, but if being happy makes you lose weight then I have lost 10 pounds. And If I do that would be great because I am a little on the heavy side, I weighed myself and I weigh 125 and last I checked I weighed 120!

I normally wouldn't care, but I want to look good for my man. He deserves it. I have the best Boyfriend in the world! He hugs me. He talks to me, and doesn't mind my 'no kissing' thing (but I might stop that soon). I'm not even clingy to him, he is clingy to me, which makes me feel a little annoyed but mostly loved. He wants to be around me, I don't feel pushy.

Maybe I'm in love. Or maybe he does a good love potion. I don't know but I can't get enough of him.

Lily

In Potions Class 

_11:00 am_

Scratch the whole "love potion" thing. He can't make potions to save his life. How cute.

Lily

In The Great hall 

_7:00 pm_

Christmas is in one week. So I am going to be separated from my boyfriend for two weeks. For once I am dreading Christmas. And I am not staying here at Hogwarts, my mom would not be happy and I sort of owe her because I couldn't be at home for the entire summer break. Maybe I could see James at least once. How will I survive?

On a different note, Aubrey has cut her hair like a boy's. I couldn't believe it. She said it was the "new and hip" style. I told her that it looked great, but like I was going to say anything else. It looks…okay. I just need to get used to it. I just don't know how. Maybe her little "experiments" have gone too far. I am going to describe it. It is about two inches long and that's about it. She keeps talking about how many style options she has now. But she also had so many style options before! How and I supposed to get used to it? What is she? Insane? She just did it today and she didn't come to dinner because she said she wasn't hungry.

Lily

In the Common Room 

_8:00 pm_

Well, Aubrey is showcasing her new look. There has only been one convincing good reaction, from Sirius. He said it looked Sexy. So that was enough to make all of the girl's sneers be erased. She is now going on and on about how it will be the new thing. I just smile and nod thinking "in what universe?" obviously in Aubrey's. I hope her hair grows very fast. Eww!

Sorry, but I think that that haircut was meant for Boys! And if it was going on a girl, then they must be a little to secure with themselves. James came up to me once and he whispered, "For once my hair is _longer _than a girl's!" He is right, his hair is pretty long for a guy's. It touches the collar of his shirt, and if he didn't comb his hair back with his fingers like he always does then it would constantly be in his eyes. Actually now that I look at it, his hair could be tucked behind his ear. Weird! That's what I do with my hair, to think that my boyfriend could do that with his!

I would like to run my fingers through his hair! Then tuck it behind his ear and then mess it all up again. He looks good with messy hair. Cute, more like it. I never noticed how wonderfully dark his eyes are. Like chocolate orbs. No Dark Chocolate orbs, with little specks of auburn. So, so cute.

I almost feel bad for my no kissing rule, it seems like suddenly everyone is kissing, and he always groans when he sees two people wrapped together on a chair or in a corner. But if he loves me he can wait. His test is still going. It will not stop until I am ready. And I am not sure if I am yet, I need a little longer. Don't think that I don't want to kiss him, I do. I just don't know if my emotions are ready for that particular rush.

Lily

In the Common Room 

_3:00 pm_

Tomorrow I am leaving to go home so I am going to be separated from James. I can't stand it! How will I survive?

But I bought him a gift. I was at a loss of what would be a good gift for a boyfriend for the very first Christmas. So I bought him a ton of candy and some filibuster's fireworks. I hope that that would be good. I am not sure.

Lily

At Home 

_Christmas Day_

_Noon_

Marry Christmas! I got my gift from James. It was green emerald earrings and a promise ring. Promising that he will ask me to marry him, even if it is not now. It is a promise that I will wait for him and that I truly do love him. It is beautiful it is gold with crystals embedded into it on the top. I love it. This is a great Christmas.

Right after I put it on he appeared in front of me. He told me that it was bewitched so that when I put it on for the first time he would be there, because he wanted to see his future wife. I kissed him, then and there. In front of my parents and petunia. Even in front of Vernon, who my mother and Father decided would be allowed to join us today because he and petunia were proposed.

Oh no! This is the end of my journal. I have to end my story for now! I don't have any room left. i might get a new one, and i migh not, we'll see.I love James!

Lily


	27. Shut Up and Kiss Me

**Shut Up and Kiss Me**

Harry shut the journal and leaned back. The journal was finished? She promised to wait until he was ready to marry him and the journal ended. How? He needed more! How does the story end?

He stood up and walked to Ginny's room. He knocked on the door. "Gin?" he called, "Gin I want to talk. Please let me in."

"Coming!" She said and opened the door. "Why have you come to when you know that I am getting ready for bed? To see me in Pajamas? Why not wait until breakfast?"

"Ha." He said letting himself in. "I finished the journal and I am not satisfied. Couldn't she have given it a proper ending? She just said 'I Love James' and it was over."

"Who said you could come in"

"No one obviously." He sat on her bed, "But can't you see I am distraught? I need to talk! You want to make me wait until breakfast! I will not be able to sleep and then I will not look as beautiful as I normally do. And you don't care. Fine I will go and figure it out on my own. Since you don't even care."

Ginny sat in a pouf by her bed, "Calm down Drama Queen. Where did you learn to throw a dramatic fit like that? Too much meddling in a girl's brain huh?"

'I am insulted."

"Fine, sis!"

"And there goes my status as a male too. I am leaving."

"No, no." she motioned for him to stay seated, "You are being very weird. You need sleep for heaven's sake. But I will talk. Because you obviously need help."

Harry lay down and sighed, "She ended it in the most horrible way. She left me hanging. How could she?"

"That journal was not written to be like a book it was written to display her thoughts and feelings. I bet she didn't expect you to read her journal. It was originally meant to be private I am sure." Ginny shook her head, "And you already know how it ends! You were born weren't you?" or are you just a figment of my imagination and Voldemort was never stopped and there was no "Golden Trio" no famous Harry Potter, and Lily did not sacrifice herself for her only son. No, that couldn't have happened, no. Harry, you know how it ends! And if you want more blanks to be filled in then ask Lupin or any of the professors who were there and taught your parents, they would be able to help."

"But that's no fun." He pouted.

'Get sleep I can't deal with a 16 year old with the brain of a 2 year old."

"Fine, but only because you are so pretty."

OoOO00OOoO

Harry Woke up in the morning and walked straight to Ginny's room. "Get up. I slept and I am ready to talk."

"Not now you aren't." she said from behind the door, "I need a bath, clean clothes and to have made myself beautiful before I present myself to people."

"No you don't you're beautiful enough already."

"I would so kiss you if I weren't wearing a face mask."

"Do you have cucumbers on your eyes?" he asked, genuinely curious.

"What? Why would I put a cucumber on my eye?"

"Muggle Girl's do."

"That does nothing! I only do what I need to do!"

"Then why are you doing the whole facial mask thing? You don't need it!" he pounded on her door. "Hurry up, I am not a patient Man."

Ginny stuck her head out. Her face was covered in a green goop and she looked slightly like a monster. "I would agree if you were actually a man." She glared at him, "And don't make fun of my mask that would be mean. And not exactly the way to woo fair lady to become your girlfriend."

"Oh you don't look THAT bad. You just look better natural. When you have that goop on I can't see your freckles."

"You are being too sweet despite my horrible ugliness."

"Am I wooing fair lady?" he asked earnestly.

'Maybe," she said then got back into her room and yelled "Now Go away."

"Will you be my girlfriend?" he called. She only gave him silence before reminding him to please go away. "Fine. But what if I don't ask again?"

"You are too much like your father to give up."

OoOO00OOoO

Ginny Finished getting herself all beautiful (although she really didn't even need it) and finally came down to breakfast. She had her hair in pigtails and was wearing a pair of shorts and a tank top. "Ginny!" yelled Ron, when she entered and sat down at the table, "Put on some clothes!"

"I'm wearing clothes idiot."

"Not enough of them! You can see your entire arm! And your legs, there is way too much. You are going to land yourself with a dishonest slimeball dressed like that. And I wont be there to save you. You would feel sorry." He said in a slightly hurt voice.

"Shut up."

"Fine. But when you are stuck with a horrible boy don't blame me."

"I already have a horrible boy." She raised her eyebrows at Harry and nodded. "I don't think you would even mind that much."

"You didn't." said Ron flatly at Harry then looked at Ginny, "See you seduced him with your arms and your legs. I do not approve."

"I don't care."

"Neither do I!" said Harry getting up to sit by Ginny. "So you agreed to be my girlfriend!" she nodded and scooted her chair closer to him. "I really do NOT mind at all."

Ron folded his arms and grunted. "Oh shove of Ron." Said Ginny grabbing for Harry's hand. "So did you have anything else to talk about your mum's Journal Harry?"

"No, I think I'm better." He said looking at Ginny in shock. He won. Just like his father. He got a gorgeous red head girl, just like his father and man he was so glad he didn't have to deal with her past relationships. "I'm just lucky."

"Shut up." Said Ron getting up and leaving the table. Then Harry swept Ginny out of her Chair and twirled her around.

"I love you."

"Shut up and Kiss me." She said wrapping her arms around his neck. She was _his _Wonderwoman. Finally.


	28. Epilogue

**Epilogue **

Harry searched everywhere in Grimuald Place and could not find another journal. He found some more pictures of his parents, but no journal. Why did that one Journal end up here? Was it the only one she wrote? If not then what was so special about this one? She got raped in this time in her life, was she going out of her way to remember it. Or was she going out of her way to forget it?

"Any luck?" asked Ginny, standing in the door with two cups of Hot Chocolate in her hands. She walked in and handed one to Harry.

"No." he pushed away boxes that were in front of him, "Just pictures."

"Have you looked at them?"

"No." he picked them up and handed to her, "Check to see if they're safe." He grumbled.

"Let's check together." She said scooting closer.

"Well if you insist." He loved having Ginny as his girlfriend, it was been about two months since he had finished the journal and he had been searching for another one ever since. The Black's had a very large attic, and some of the boxes had hexes and curses he had to break through to get in them. So he and Ginny would get to look together, it was kind of cool. He learned things about her in the talks they had, like the fact that Ginny never cried. Growing up with 6 brothers toughened her up. If she cried when she was little she was a crybaby. So she trained herself not to cry. She learned about Ron's "secret" crush on Hermione.

"Oh I do insist." She sat on his lap and he leaned against a large chest filled with old wizard robes.

The first picture was as still picture of James and Lily when they were on a date. Apparently they were not aware the picture was taken because Lily had a look like her eyes were half open and her hand was moving, like she was in the middle of talking to James. James was looking at her like she was a jewel and anyone could see that he had a twinkle in his eyes. Ginny Smiled, "It's like us, when we are talking up here, only they are not in an old musty attic. They look like they are in The Three Broomsticks."

Harry nodded numbly and Ginny flipped to the next photo, "It was Lily oh James's shoulders running around the Lake. This picture was moving. Lily was waving her arms around and James was trying his best to run around with Lily on top of him, making him off-balanced. Lily was obviously screaming in delight and James was laughing. "Aww, how cute!" said Ginny. "Well say something!" she said elbowing him lightly in the ribs.

"They are very happy."

"Good job Mr. Obvious." She flipped to another photo of them eating in the great hall at breakfast. This was another still picture Lily was laughing and James was obviously in the middle of telling a very dramatic story. His eyes were wide and he was obviously in the most exciting part because his mouth was open as big as he could get it and his arms was moving.

She continued to go through the pictures. They were mostly moving pictures of James and Lily together laughing and having fun. One of James feeding Lily some chicken at dinner was kind of funny because obviously it was not Lily's first choice of food, and she had a disgusted look on her face and her hands were moving to her mouth to keep herself from spitting it up. James was laughing and in the End lily ended up playfully slapping him. Ginny had a remark for almost every one of them.

Then obviously the pictures were in order because the pictures were getting a little bit more intimate. Lily and James sitting on a chair together, kissing without shame. On of her with her legs wrapped around his hips and her arms around his neck and her was toddling around the picture. Both Lily and James kissing like they would never kiss again. In all of the pictures Lily was wearing her promise ring. Which Ginny thought was so romantic.

Ginny went crazy when they came to a picture that was of them at sunset. They had obviously been walking around the Lake and James was on one knee and Lily was crying. He was proposing. The person who took the picture was probably hidden because they weren't close the madly in love duo.

The next picture was on Lily showing off her new ring. It was a lot fancier than the promise ring, but simpler at the same time. It was a simple band with a huge white-diamond rock sticking out the top. In the picture Lily was crying, probably from happiness. Then there was a picture of the two love-struck teenagers kissing again.

The last group was of James getting ready for the wedding. There was one picture of him in his boxers getting his fancy dress robes out, then one of him trying to figure out how to get them on. The last one was James wearing the robes and trying to tackle his hair. He eventually just pushed it back and left it as it was.

"See that is how it ends, and that's how it is. Is this okay, even if you didn't find her journal?" Ginny asked, leaning into his chest.

"I guess." He sighed, "too bad I couldn't find the other one. I was getting interested."

"Well Duh." She said before turning around and planting a kiss on his cheek. "Love you Honey." She whispered, "So will we end up like your parents?"

"We will have to wait love, you are in fifth year and I'm in sixth as on next week." He pulled out a little white box, "Will this help?" he opened it and there was a gold ring with little crystals implanted into the gold. "Lupin had the ring that dad gave mum, and I though that this one would be a good choice, don't you agree?"

"Your mum's promise ring?" she gasped.

"Will you wait for me?"

"Yes I will." She said before pushing him over to kissing him smack-dab on the lips for a very long time. Harry knew that even though he didn't get another diary he would be fine. He had his wonderwoman and her family. What more could he really want?

OoOO00OOoO

The story is over now. I am sorry, and there is no sequel. I am currently working on my new story though. It is about Ron and Hermione's daughter. It will have something of a twist so please read it!

I-Want-To-See-You-Smile


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